I took the dare
Upon my hardware
I'm sad to say this ends in hell
I'm a newbie
Beyond compare
Don't know my scripts from my HTML
I know all the risks
Of the world wide web
Don't want no tutorial guide
But maybe - I'm being slightly clueless
Ain't got no antivirus
And now the gits have got inside

No firewall
I ain't got no spyware trackers, just a haven for hackers
No firewall
It's hard to go a-surfing when your mass-infected browser crashes down

I don't feel surprised, or break down and cry
Whenever my laptop's a tool
Switch - OFF! Let it reboot
Procedure ain't my strong suit
No patience left to follow rules

No firewall
I ain't got no spyware trackers, just a haven for hackers
No firewall
It's hard to go a-surfing with a mass-infected browser!
No firewall
I ain't got no spyware trackers!
No firewall
It's hard to go a-surfing when your mass-infected browser crashes down

In the morning
Ain't no doubt
I'll go buy new hardware
Throw the old dud out

No firewall
I ain't got no spyware trackers, just a haven for hackers
No firewall
It's hard to go a-surfing with a mass-infected browser!
No firewall
I ain't got no spyware trackers!
No firewall
It's hard to go a-surfing when your mass-infected browser crashes down

(repeat to fade)