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Song Parodies -> "Eisley's Cantina"

Original Song Title:

"Candida"

Original Performer:

Tony Orlando and Dawn

Parody Song Title:

"Eisley's Cantina"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

( instrumental intro )

The storm troopers shout
'Cause they know that you're about
But they couldn't catch the glow
Of your eyes

And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
Tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds


Eisley's Cantina!
See who'll take us together!
The further from this world the better!

Where they dare to wrestle free

Eisley's Cantina!
Must pay some man who will lead us!
Imperials won't impede us!

Since the Princess called to me


Now some-thing's amiss
Kenobi never looked like this
Said he felt disturbing mayhem
In the spacetime

Slowed down, from hyper-drive
As an asteroid went by
And Alderaan was gone --- none left a-live!


Eisley's Cantina!
Freaks who'd bake us with blasters!
A hundred impending disasters!

Must take care, it's time to leave!

Eisley's Cantina!
Han Solo blasted in the gut
That loan shark from
Jab-ba The Hutt!

Thug is dead though no one grieves


( -- instrumental -- )


And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
You know I'm tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds!


Eisley's Cantina!
R-2's got the Death-Star plans!
Blockade runner Han Solo's our man!

Brags of Kes-sel run-ning speed!

(running speed ---
--- running speed ) Eisley's Cantina!

Take off now Fal-con, trans-port us!

Hare-ship
to
Darth Vader's
Tortoise!

'Cause Luke's sister called to me

( repeat to fade )

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Ravyn Rant - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
I really had to dredge the memory banks for the original tune (no sound card on this machine). This was fun! 555
Stuart McArthur - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
5s just for giving me the chance to hear that horrible OS again JD - rolled gold 70s rhythms there! - DK much about Star Wars but automatic 555 for you, mate
alvin rhodes - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
great job...i felt like i was THERE
Stephen Harrington - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
555, very good. Brings back Star Wars memories.
Johnny D - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Ravyn, Stuart, alvin, and Stephen.
AFW - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Like Stuart, I'm not into SW...but a clever write, nonetheless
Johnny D - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Thank you, AFW.
Larry Hensley - May 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Also not into Star Wars, but still liked it, very amusing
Johnny D - May 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry.
Michael Pacholek - May 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Five credits should allow you to avoid any... Imperial entanglements.
Johnny D - July 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Belated thanks, Michael Pacholekwalker.

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