Ties, hangin' from your closet hooks
Ties, wear one to enhance your looks
Ties, one for every father's day
Ties, man these things are so damn gay

Ties, sold in every Sears store
Please, please, please don't get me any more

Ties, ties on every businessman
Ties, ties of red or black or tan
Ties, this one looks just like a fish
Ties, not wearing one's my only wish

Ties, why they have to be so tight
Ties, ties, ties, I may put up a fight

Ties, why are they professional
Guys who wear ties, they should all go to hell

Ties, no more ties, no more ties, no more ties
Ties, ties, ties, ties, ties