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Song Parodies -> "Habanero"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Eagles

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

Habanero (pronounced "hah-bin-yair-oh") peppers are among the hottest, if not THE hottest, of all peppers.
Oh how you thunder my senses
You been in my intestines
For so long now

Oh, you're a hot one
( An' ) I know that you got your seeds in
They're like little beads, and they
Burn through me, yeee-OWW!

Don't you eat those seeds of fire, boy
They'll burn holes in your colon
Although Pepto Bismol can give you some relief

Now it seems to me, some hot things
Down your guts have been a-rollin'
When they exit you they'll burn be-yond belief

Oh your burn's gettin' much stronger
Your heat's lastin' longer
It's drivin' me mad

Ah methane, oh methane
Well, that's my intestines talkin'
My abdomen's squawkin'
An' I'm fartin' so bad

If your feet get cold in the winter time
Ha-be-ner-o can warm your toes fine
Ain't hard to smell them peppers fumigate

You're passin' gas so hot it glows
It ain't funny when that vapor blows your way

You've blown away all my senses
I have no defenses
Butt's a hot-plate

I sit here strainin'
Butt flares with pain though I want more
You better wear some rubber gloves, or,
(Wear some rubber gloves or)
This pepper you'll hate
New song Rick D and I wrote together because of this site.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Guy - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
This is a hot one for sure JD. Since they don't don't grow a lot of pumpkins in my location, when the first freeze of the winter season comes the saying goes "There's frost on the habanero this morning". And it's got to get really down there to make a habanero chill.
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for spicing up the commentary, Guy!
mac - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
And thanks for your "hot" vote, too!
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, mac !
Adagio - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
I say that I like to bite my food, not the other way around. Really good job on this one, Johnny! 5's
Helpful Hint - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
A guy who has been eating haberanos should always wash his hands before touching his woman. Believe me.
Rick D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Still on a "hot" roll, eh? Johnnie, you were there last night in spirit. Bob Gomez got up on stage and wowed 'em with "Free Samplin" and we sang "Where Bryant Sleeps Tonight." We also sat out in the car with Paul and played our song. The owner asked Bob to come open for a comedy night, he was ready to audition some more after he got the gig. Leah says she'll be back on the site with a vengence. Next week, Mari and I will perform "They Flew" live. Let you know how it goes.
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Adagio: Thanks! Habaneros are actually my favorite hot pepper.

Helpful Hint: Thanks, and yes, good advice!

Rick D: Thanks, and it sounds like a fun time was had by all. Wish I could have been there! Great to hear about Bob and Leah, too. Yes, please tell me all about how your live performance of "They Flew Beyond The Sky" goes! Speaking of auditions..... a short while ago I learned that I have been called-back for final auditions for The Concord Players' upcoming production of "1776". At my first audition this past Wednesday night, I dressed in a plain black cotton three-piece suit (I own one, from "Deva"), with pocket watch and chain, and I took my middle-of-my-back-length hair out of its ponytail. I auditioned in the character of Stephen Hopkins, the crusty old rum-drinkin' delegate from the colony of Rhode Island. I guess they liked my audition. First time I've done something like this in over 23 years! I think I have a pretty good chance of being cast as one of the 24 men in "1776", most of which are chorus parts with lots of singing and a few spoken lines each. I don't expect to land a larger speaking role, since I've been out of the acting game for more than two decades, and since this is my first time auditioning for The Concord Players.....but my wife asked me to stay optimistic - she reminded me that it's not over yet! We shall see.... The callback auditions are this Sunday afternoon in Concord. I'll keep y'all posted.
Jack Wilson - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Great job, Johnny! Check out the google ads on the side everyone
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Jack! Yeah, those ads are "hot stuff" !
Adagio - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Good luck and break a leg with this perfomance...congratulations on being called back a second time, Johnny! I believe that you can do crusty well and then turn around and do something beautiful like your other parody. :)
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Adagio, thank you so much!
Guy - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey JD - I'm rooting for you too. What Pat said with the leg stuff. That is really neat that you got another audition.
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Guy!
Stray Pooch - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Rhode Island passes!! Well, I never seen, heard or SMELLED a pepper so dangerous it can't be SUNG about!!! Hell yeah, I'm for parodying anything! The vote is 5s! :D (Pooch hoping you get the allusion - and the part!)
Arwen - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
I am dying!!! 5s!!
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Stray Pooch! And Arwen - thank you, too, and please live to write another day, for me, please??
Claude Prez - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
I agree with Adagio-- food shouldn't involve pain, as a rule. Hot stuff Johnny.
Guy - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Pat - I must have missed your comment earlier about liking to bite your food not the other way around. haha. I'm just the opposite. The hotter the better. The Chinese chilis they use at the Mongolian Barbeque here make those habaneros taste like candy. Woo them chilis is some kinda hot.
Johnny D - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Claude!

Hotter than habaneros? Guy - I want some! Sometimes my wife says I have no tastebuds left.
Adagio - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Try Thai food sometimes...the dish they serve comes with a degree of hotness. 1 -5 Before you all jump in and say 5, my son, who is used to hot degree #3, and sat there sweating and sniffing and was almost purple in the face.
Guy - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thai food is the hottest in the world I believe. I eat that as well and I have ordered it full blast. There are two others at work and we always have the one-upsmanship game when we go to lunch for Thai to see who can stand it the longest and eat the hottest. Boy don't get around that computer room after lunch on these days..

Now you all know where I get my material for my flatulence parodies. We always schedule Thai lunch days when we have inspectors in. It makes them want to get done and out ASAP.
Adagio - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Guy..your comment about Thai food really made me crack up...the bit about eating Thai food on the day inspectors come. lololol!!!!
Guy - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey we do't know why that works for sure. Stumbled on it by accident one day and it has worked ever since.
Guy - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Alright JD! Sounds like a major part. Way cool!
Johnny D - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy! It's not a major part in terms of total number of lines - but it's a cool role due to a number of short but dramatic scenes that focus on Dr. Lyman, at the beginning and at the end of the show. I'm happy about it!
Adagio - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Congratulations on getting your part, Johnny! Of course, we knew you were so multi-talented that it was practically a given. :D
Mari D - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Break a leg, Johnny!
Johnny D - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Adagio and Mari D! Dr. Lyman Hall is a really neat dramatic role. His character's inner motivation throughout the story is his struggle with the conflict between his responsibility to his constituents and his responsibility to his own personal integrity and conscience - a struggle that reaches a climax in a very low-key, quiet, but dramatic scene involving only Dr. Hall and John Adams. I'm very pleased with the role - I hope I can do it justice!
Stray Pooch - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny, Dr. Hall is a HUGE roll!! Granted he doesn't get a lot of lines or a song but he is the conscience of the entire congress. I don't know if you got the post I aimed at you on someone else's parody when you first mentioned this, but "1776" is among my favorite musicals. It is one my eldest daughter and I share as "our" musical. My family history includes Caesar Rodney. I bet I can recite almost the whole show from memory; I've probably watched it a thousand times!! It may interest you to know, incidentally, that many of the lines in that play are from historical documents. An example: just before that dramatic scene in the chamber between Dr. Hall and Adams, John sings a song where he envisions the future: "Through all the gloom, through all the doom I can see the rays of ravishing light and glory!!" Those lines (and others in the song) are taken directly from a letter he wrote to Abigail predicting that July 2nd would be celebrated as a national holiday with fireworks, parades, etc. (He was a couple of days off.) That happens all through the play. I swear, Johnny, I'm half tempted to visit Massachusetts to see this thing - especially since I spent ten years there and LOVE that place!!! At any rate, congratulations on winning a great part AND on having the courage and drive to go for it!!! This touches several chords with me and I'm really happy for ya!! Break a leg!
Stray Pooch - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Already did, Johnny. I got curious and figured there would be something out there. I wasn't disappointed. I wanted to say "Nice publicity photo" but I figured it might be a little uncool - Privacy and all that! So now that the cat is out of the bag - Nice publicity photo!! I notice the part of my ancestor is yet unfilled. Couldn't find anyone ugly enough?? :D
Johnny D - February 02, 2004 - Report this comment
It was filled and now it is un-filled..... I do not know why - could be any number of reasons - but at least we now have an Adams and a Dickinson. I'm sure someone will be found to portray your ancestor!

Vanity speaks: that was not "my" publicity photo - that was a snapshot somebody took while I was delivering my first audition monologue in-character as Stephen Hopkins. If I don't cut my hair, I might be the only guy in the cast who won't need a wig as part of his costume!

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