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Song Parodies -> "Galileo"

Original Song Title:

"Desperado"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Eagles

Parody Song Title:

"Galileo"

Parody Written by:

Andy Primus

The Lyrics

Read these notes before reading the parody, unless you already know about the conflict between Galileo Galilei and Johannes Kepler :)

In 1543 Nicolaus Copernicus (Polish astronomer) published his views that the Sun, and not the Earth, was the centre of the universe.

In 1609 Johannes Kepler (German mathematician, astronomer and astrologer) published his views that tides were caused by the Moon, and that the orbits of planets were elliptical.

In 1615 Galileo Galilei (Italian physicist, mathematician and astronomer) tried to persuade the Roman Catholic Church not to ban the book that had been published by Copernicus in 1543.
In February 1616 the book was banned by the Church because it did not conform to their views. Galileo, although cleared by the Roman Inquisition of any wrong doing, was ordered not to defend the idea that the Earth was not the centre of the universe.
Later the same year Galileo published his views that tides were caused by the Sun, and that the orbits of planets were circular. It was released in the form of a letter addressed to Cardinal Alessandro Orsini (one of his patrons). Galileo dismissed the ideas of Kepler as a work of fiction.

Kepler was right, and Galileo was wrong.

---------------------------------------

Ken = knowledge and understanding
Cowson (UK slang) = general term of abuse in reference to another person
Nay = no
Dunny (AUS/NZ slang) = toilet
Pate = the mind (or brain, or head)

Friesian = type of European cow, originally from the province of Friesland in the Netherlands (pronounce as “freeze”, and slide the “i”, “a” and “n” into a “yun” sound that rhymes with the shun sound of motion/potion etc)



(As sung by Johannes Kepler in 1616, after reading the views of Galileo Galilei)
--------------------
Galileo…you wrote to Card’nal Orsini
Your ken on tides is teeny…you’re so wrong now
Oh, you’re a cowson…an’ I bet your parents were Friesians
Your tides view: unfeasible…it’s hardly some wow …

For you draw the wrong conclusions, man, the moon is what is able…
To really raise the tides, an’ make our shorelines wet
Now it seems, to me, no fine things have been claimed about your fable…
For we only like the ones where truth is met

Galileo…oh, you ain’t stealin’ my thunder
My gain is your blunder…they’re likin’ my tome
You’re steamin’; I’m beamin’…well, that’s coz your books are tankin’
Your prose ain’t worth rankin’: that’s what’s round all o’ Rome

If our work got polled, I’ve the winner line
For orbits, go for the book that’s mine
Elliptical is right, but…you say nay
When readin’ all your lies, I doze
In the dunny now, your failin’ prose will lay

Galileo…you don’t have logical senses
When more work commences…open the pate
You’ve been complainin’…coz Nico’s book had a ban due
In smelly poo that’s gonna land you
(Poo that’s gonna land you)
In smelly doo that’s gonna land you
An’, boy, I can’t wait


Thanks to TT for the suggestion to do a parody about Galileo.

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User Comments

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Patrick - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Quite erudite. We all know the world revolves around amiright.
Old Man Ribber - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Andy - Nicely done. Were you aware that Galileo's father Vincenzo Galilei was a famous Renaissance musician/composer? ;D
TJC - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
This was music to my spheres! So, you're goin' 'Turtle' on us--takin' us along on yer fun way ticket to Erudition City?!
John Barry - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Has anybody seen my Gal'? Great job.
unKnownVotress - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
on the shores oGalilee, He be, Sir !
Andy P - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks all, for the funny comments

OMR - I didn't know that until Saturday, when I did the research. Are you aware that Galileo's brother Michelangelo Galilei was a famous Renaissance musician/composer? ;D

TJC - LOL @ fun way ticket. I thought about goin' 'Turtle', but I couldn't be bothered to write all the extra footnotes :)
Below Average Dave - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
I happen to be taking Civilization right now, and just recently read about Galileo and Michelangelo both--funny how you see college teachings in even the most removed aspects of life--555 on principle, great title to this song by the way
Tommy Turtle - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Cock-a-loop, Mate! (Did I get that right?)

Sequel: GG's fight with the Church, where under threat of torture and excommunication, he knelt in open court and recanted his "heretical" views. Supposedly, as he did so, he muttered under his breath, (from memory; might not be exact)

"Ne sic movebo" or something, meaning: "Nevertheless, it moves" (the Earth, despite his "confession").

Thanks for the shout-out, and for executing it so well... btw, "nay" works over here, too, as in oral voting: "The ayes have it" (passed) or "The nays have it" (it didn't pass). Aye say, "Aye, Aye, Aye", as in Fayve, Fayve, Fayve.

LOL @ JAB!
Mark Scotti - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Starry....starry night, fantastic!!!
Andy P - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks to:

BAD - i've just looked at a site for US Civilization courses, and they look very interesting. If it's all the same standard courses in the US, then you must be doing "Western Civilization 2: 1000 to 1800". That's one of my favourite reading topics. I've been studying European history on a hobby basis for about 30 years, on and off. Good luck with it & I hope to see some of what you're learning in parody form :)

TT - nearly. It's cock-a-hoop :)
I see that you worked out china plate.
"Eppur si muove" - the jury is still out over whether he really did say that though.
Keep pointing out any words that I explain that are obvious to most Americans.

Mark - great comment LOL
Christie Marie M - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
A stellar parody! Illuminating and great exploration of the satire. 555.
Andy P - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks Christie - glad that you enjoyed it
Michael Pacholek - January 29, 2011 - Report this comment
Sorry it took me so long to find this one. I guess the planets weren't aligned until now. Wouldn't it have been something to hear them debate each other? As for Kepler, well, I'm not sure he ever really keppled. (Oh, what are you gonna do, excommunicate me for that joke?)
Andy P - February 03, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks for the v/c, Michael - better late than never. The debate would be very interesting.

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