-> "Oat Cell Carcinoma"
Original Song Title:
Parody Song Title:
"Oat Cell Carcinoma"
On a dark wretched Friday
Tooled in for some care
Long spell of bronchitis
Causing me to be scared
Sputum red with persistence
I viewed the symptoms in fright
My breath was wheezy and the signs were grim
I had to stop for a light
Wearing scrubs, they explored me
I heard them wish me well
With high-tech thingy's I was delved
They stood bewildered and just couldn't tell
Then they switched on a panel
Had me glowing with rays
There were noises and a horrid roar
My doc emerged to say
"Well, chum, you've got oat cell carcinoma
What an ugly case, (what an ugly case) - such an ugly waste
Plenty of gloom with the oat cell carcinoma
And your time is near, (and your time is near) - anytime, we fear"
My mind knew whiffing was risky
So thought my persuasive friends
They plotted lots of pretty shifty ploys
'Bleep' all them
How I danced with the hazard
Some cancers dismember
Some lead to your death
So I called for the chaplain
"Please bring me my lights"
He said, "We haven't let that curse in here
Since nineteen patients died"
And still my choices appalling were dark and gray
Waking up to go piddle in the night
I could hear him say
"Hell, son, you've got oat cell carcinoma
What a plunge to face, (what a plunge to face) - need a lung replaced
You're givin' it up with the oat cell carcinoma
And your vice despised, (and your vice despised) has metastasized"
Fear and disbelieving
My shrink complained in spite, and he said
"We are all just visitors here
All go home each night"
And in a last ditch effort
They lathered and degreased
They jabbed me with their sterile spikes
But I just can't get released
Last week of December, I was veg'ing in the ward
I had a mind to pull the plug and to face my Holy Lord
"Alas," said the night nurse, "We have orders to revive
You can pass out anytime you like... but you can never die"
(Guitar Solo Until End)
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|How Funny: ||5.0|
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|Total Votes: ||18|
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