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Song Parodies -> "Strife In The Fast Lane"

Original Song Title:

"Life In The Fast Lane"

Original Performer:

The Eagles

Parody Song Title:

"Strife In The Fast Lane"

Parody Written by:

Dee Range

The Lyrics

If I'd just stayed off of those L.A. freeways...
She was a slow movin' gal
Maybe deaf dumb and blind some
Her driving definitely shitty
Left blinker on, just keep in mind son
It's been on since we left the city

She had a rusty little Geo that was junkyard food
I think she was toothless, and half stoned on 'Ludes
If I see her head noddin', we're as good as dead
I yelled "Faster Grandma, I'm tired of breathin' lead"

Strife in the fast lane
Who the hell am I behind?
Strife in the fast lane

Sitttin' still in the car

See her inaction...her drivin' is lame
I could be in traction, my speed just the same
I can hear her car knockin', might be a piston head
Or her pacemaker squawkin', 'cause the batteries dead

I glanced up in my mirror, then felt the crash
And I couldn't help but notice a white Bronco had me smashed
Damn, it was O.J., my temper ignites
I was too pissed to take it, so I insist we fight about it

Knife in the fast lane, suddenly I have some doubt
Knifed in the fast lane, OWW!!
Knifed in the fast lane, here I am, bleedin' out
Knife's made a fast drain, uh oh

Sirens a howlin', medics just curse
They couldn't get the blood stopped, said I'd soon need a hearse
I said, "Hurry driver", but just then to my dismay
Here comes frikkin' Nicole Ritchie, and she's goin' the wrong way

I said, "Call the graveyard, I won't survive the crash"
I think I know what's comin': it's not me in Nicole's gash
Now I'm layin' on this gurney, hear the coroner cough
Last word's I hear are "I'm still pissed O.J. got off"

And that was life on my last day
Knifed in the fast lane

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   10
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 10
 

User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
It's SO great that you're submitting regularly again, Dee. This was a doozy...grannies, OJ, frikkin' Nicole Ritchie; just...genius. Take note, everyone...this is how it's done. 555+++
Peregrin - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Beautiful! Loved "Left blinker on, just keep in mind son; It's been on since we left the city" :)
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Kristof and Peregrin...many thanks, especially for overlooking the missing 2 syllables in the blinker line...which should read:
Left blinker on, but just keep it in mind son"
3Somehow the corrections didn't make it into my proof-read submission.
I blame Al-Queada
Matthias - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Why if you're not doing somebody in your parodies, somebody is dead? Are you really a Goth on the inside Dee Range? Well in that case sink your fangs into these fives instead of another bat head.
Ann Hammond - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
he he
Dylan Baranski - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Did you know that a typical driver spends 24 hours per year stuck in traffic, but L.A. drivers spend 136 hours per year? In any case, you spend 555 hours per year in traffic. Having said that, if you're dead, how did you write this parody? Also, to solve some of your traffic woes, may I suggest to you a GMC General tractor-trailer truck? If you want the Chevy one instead, I can suggest a Chevy Bison, though those are rarer.
stuart mcarthur - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
wow, a few doozy twists and turns here Dee, and the cast of characters just kept on comin' - can't wait for the Mel Gibson instalment - 555
alvin - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
as a LA resident , i found this dead on perfect ...405.....oops, i mean 555
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Matthias: Goth darn it, I gueth tho :-)

Ann : To he or not to he, was that the question? :-)

Dylan: Being a writer, I of course carry a tape recorder with me at all times, so I actually recorded this as it was happening, while I was waiting in traffic. The coroner was kind enough to submit it for me, thereby granting my death-bed last wish. Though how I explain these comments is gonna take some more thought :-). Hope I cleared that up for ya :-)

Stu, I sure wish I had thought of putting Mel Gibson in this! Dammit !! How 'bout you write the sequel about Mel, to the Beatles' "If I Fell", let's call it "If I'm Mel"

If I'm Mel and I get stewed
Then pulled over by a Jew
Who cuffs me, here's the plan.....

Take it away from there!
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Alvin: my condolences on living in L.A. -LOL- loved the 405 Freeway reference, thanks.
Dylan Baranski - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
You solved one question, yet raised another: How did you even know I was gonna comment on this one? Do you have psychic powers or something?
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Dylan: You forgot to read the next to last sentence in my first reply to you. And I have never been "Psychic"...psychotic, yes, but never psychic :-)
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Jack, the non-sequitur about Native American excrement? WTF? Got no idea what you are alluding to, dude. I don't write about crap, or read them either. So, no offense, but I'm going to report your comment and have it removed, because it seems to me that you are implying that I wrote a parody about "Native American excrements", and nothing could be further from the truth.
AFW - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
A blockbuster job here, Dee....You've practically written a mini movie script...Top scores
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
AFW, many thanks, man...
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Cherokee PEE PEE, Dee
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
I was referncing Cherokee Peepee, but still this was awesome
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
I actually thought you;d know what I meant right away
Red Ant - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
"I think I know what's comin': it's not me in Nicole's ..."; you are on fire as of late, Dee! Whatever you're taking send some my way, lol 555
Dee Range - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Jack, you need to look up the word excrement in the dictionary. It is obvious you never watched "THE JERK", with Steve Martin, because if you had, you would know the difference between sh!t and shinola, or in this case , urine. And in the aforementioned parody, pee pee is used as a euphemism for a penis, not urine, so it's not even about THAT. Go back and read it again, if you doubt it.

Thanks, Red Ant. After having written only 8 parodies in the year following Patty's death, I have tried to kick the depression with humor, and it seems to be working a little. Glad you have been enjoying them!
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
I knew itd be messed up hwne I posted it anyways, and I have seen that movie, and yeah, it was just.. ahh I knew that part of the comment was messed up in the first place.I have readt hat parody too.
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2007 - Report this comment
But back to the subject of cars and trips and stuff, ya missedt he gem from me www.amiright.com/80s/eddygrant6.shtml
Dylan Baranski - June 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Since JW put up his Eddy Grant parody about cars & stuff, I figure I'll put mine here: www.amiright.com/parody/80s/eddygrant7.shtml Since I'm mentioning the GMC General a bunch lately, I figure I may write a parody about that soon.
Jack Wilson - June 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Dylan, it's not even about cars thats why I said cars and trips
Jack Wilson - June 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Woops wrong address /www.amiright.com/parody//80s/eddygrant6.shtml

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