On a dark leather weight-bench
Hot sweat in his hair
Warm smell of cold feet is
Rising up through the air

In his head is insistence
He sees him winning all right
The bar-bell's heavy, and his mind is dim
He had to stop for the night

There she stood in the doorway
Her curves looked really swell
He was thinking to himself,
"It would be Heaven to sniff her sweet smell"

So her hip up he'd handle
And he moaned, "Ah, o-kay"
Then his voice expounded overtures
She thought she heard him say

"Welcome to the Grope Of Schwarzenegger!
You hahve lovely hips,
(you hahve lovely hips)
Und such lovely tits!"

Plenty of room in the Hand of Schwarzenegger

"Any kind of rear,
(any kind of rear)
I vill grind it here!"

His mind Testosterone-twisted
His muscles covered in oil
He made a lot of pretty, pretty girls
From him recoil

Down their pants he would grope hard
Sweet bummer's sweat
Some pants let him enter
Some pants grew so wet

Someone called the cop-captain --
"He's feeling my thigh!"
He said,
"Con-sider your-self lucky, dear, that, it ain't 69"

You feel his voice heavy-breathing from much too close
Wakes you up in the middle of the night,
Bratwurst fingers, gross!

"Welcome to the Grope Of Schwarzenegger!
You hahve lovely hips,
(you hahve lovely hips)
Und such lovely tits!"

He's feelin' her up with the Grope of Schwarzenegger

"What a nicer thigh!
(what a nicer thigh)
Bring your pal, she's bi!"

Mirrors on his ceiling
(And) Pink Shriver looks nice
(And) She said,
"I am just a prisoner, dear, of your pumped-up life"

And then in Ahhnold's chambers,
They gathered for their feast
He'd stab her with his meaty knife, but the steroids killed his beast

Last thing Gray remembers,
He was running from re-call
He failed to find a message that would assuage the voters' gall

"Relax," said The Ahhnold,
"I am destined to achieve.
I am groping Caw-lee-forn-ya now,
So you had better leave!"

[--- extra chorus added on orders of The Governator ---]

"Welcome to the Grope Of Schwarzenegger,
Caw-lee-for-nee-ya!
(Caw-lee-for-nee-ya)
You ahh in my paw!"

Sacramento's in the Grope of Schwarzenegger

"Bring me frauleins here,
(bring me frauleins here)
Mit ze finest rears!"