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Song Parodies -> "Kaizen Blitz"

Original Song Title:

"Ballroom Blitz"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Kaizen Blitz"

Parody Written by:

Mr. Wompy

The Lyrics

If you have ever worked for a company that uses some version of the Toyota Business System, you should enjoy this song. If you have worked in corporate America some time in the last decade or so, you should at least get a few chuckles out of this.
Are you ready, Larry? Yes.
Sandy? Oh, yes.
Phil? OK.
Daniel? Yes.
Pam? Yeah.
Annika? Yes.
Steve? OK.
Art? Yes.
Alright, folks ....let's do it!

Oh, our process needs improvement
To make sure our objectives will be met .... aha.
So let's apply the tools we have.
If we don't, it's something we'll regret.

Oh, there's a man at the side
With a PowerPoint slide and he's acting like he's really smart.
And the babe in the corner
(I think she's a foreigner) is always trying to pick him apart!

Oh, yeah, one guy was sighing, acronyms were flying,
Laptops were humming, ideas were forthcoming!
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
And a man named Art showed a big flow chart
'Cause you do that in a Kaizen Blitz!
And a girl named Pam showed a histogram
'Cause you do that in a Kaizen Blitz!
Kaizen Blitz, Kaizen Blitz, Kaizen Blitz
Kaizen Blitz

We use the Six Sigma process,
And we always ask "Why?" five times, too.
We listen to the voice of the customer,
And use Japanese words like genchi genbutsu.

Oh, the man at the side
Has a PowerPoint slide with a cause-and-effect diagram!
And the babe in the corner
Has chosen to ignore him 'cause she's getting rid of her email spam!

Oh, yeah, mouses were clicking, post-it notes were sticking,
Buzzwords were spoken, old habits were broken!
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
And an IP tech found a bottleneck
'Cause you do that in a Kaizen Blitz!
And someone revealed our first pass yield,
'Cause you do that in a Kaizen Blitz!
Kaizen Blitz

Oh, yeah, bathroom breaks were taken, old beliefs were shaken,
We were value stream mapping! There was no time for napping!
No, No, No, No, No, No
Mr. VanPelt was our Master Black Belt
'Cause you need one at a Kaizen Blitz!
And a lady named Liz did analysis
'Cause you do that in a Kaizen Blitz!
Kaizen Blitz, Kaizen Blitz, Kaizen Blitz
Kaizen Blitz

It's it's a Kaizen Blitz, it's it's a Kaizen Blitz
It's it's a Kaizen Blitz, yeah, it's a Kaizen Blitz

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   3
 5   1

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Meriadoc - August 04, 2008 - Report this comment
Sorry to see that someone 1'd you on this. Although I didn't understand most of it, I could still see the humor. 4-5-5.
McKludge - August 04, 2008 - Report this comment
You forgot Taguchi methods, and ISO 9001, and Capability Maturity Model, and ....

I've lived through all that drek, and I'm sure in another 20 years a PhD scholar from Johns Hopkins or some such will invent another paperwork generating timewaster like the above mentioned crap.

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