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Song Parodies -> "In Love With Your Fist"

Original Song Title:

"Love The One You're With"

Original Performer:

Stephen Stills

Parody Song Title:

"In Love With Your Fist"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

My inspiration for this was stroked by Rick D's entry in the December SOTM contest, “I'm My Own Girlfriend”...thanks, Rick...
When you're home and alone
and you feel a stiff'ning down in your bone
Reach on down, and grip it, hey !
Grab your member and then yank away

Your penis grows
as it fills with blood
As you yank away on your pud
So if you can't find anyone to love, buddy
Stroke it with your fist
Choke it with a twist
Soon you'll feel the bliss
It's all in the wrist

You're so horny - it's so thick
You're tense and restless; heavy as a brick
Ain't no girl around to screw
So much frustration; need to shoot some goo

And now your hose
you grasp in your glove
and you gasp and grunt and you huff
And though the ‘lover' with you is a bluff, Sonny
Grasp it with your mitts
Undulate your hips
Don't loosen your grip
Yank it ‘til it spits

Got a hard-on; it's full of jam
You've got no girl; so you slam your ham
There's none around; ain't got no date
Just one solution; gotta masturbate

You'll moan and shout
and you'll shoot your stuff
As your semen flies you'll go “UHH”
And now you're thinkin', “Once was not enough”, was it?
So you grab your gland
Take it in your hand
Slammin' on your ham
Feels so good, oh damn

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh, shoot goo
shooting, oh, you're shooting your goo
shooting goo, till you're through !

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   16

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
very touching...5s
Rick D. - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Whee. So much for Whatfreaks.
Johnny D - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Whaddaya mean, "So much for Whatfreaks" ? This parody is a clean, G-Rated, family-friendly little ditty about nothing more naughty than grasping one's erect penis in one's hand and yanking it until it ejaculates semen. What's so dirty about that?
Rick D - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I stand erected, er I mean, corrected.
Johnny D - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I knew you'd COME to your senses,' don' forget ta' klean-up yer kilt there, laddy.
Johnny D - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Paul, I gotta tell ya, dude, this parody made me laugh out loud ... in fact, I laughed 'til I --- er, never mind. 555!
John Barry - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Midlevel 5s!
Dick Cheney - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody is the song President George W. Bush sings all day, every day, in the "Oval Office". Both Karl Rove and I frequently give him a hand, too.
Adagio (hiding behind sunglasses) - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment comment.
Paul Robinson - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
JD - thanks for standing behind me here (might not be safe to be standing in front on this one)...alvin, glad you were touched...hey, if you're touched, I'm touched...guess we're all a bit "touched" around here...Rick, I really went to great...err..."lengths" to keep the language here within the acceptable realm, but then JD already 'splained about that...yeah.."Whee", for sure...thanks, JB..."Dick" - uhh...well, that about sums up my remark to you, sir...I hear they are changing the song "Hail to the Chief" to "Here Comes The Chief"...Adagio...I won't make the comment I was thinking about making about it being a good thing you had sunglasses on...Nope...not going to make that remark here...
Kristof Robertson - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I have NO IDEA how you managed to get this one thru...well done! 555
Michael Pacholek - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
You didn't monkey around with this one. Five fingers clamped tight.
Paul Robinson - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof - See Johnny D's explanation...Michael P - and the other 5 five fingers wrapped around the OTHER banana...thanks!
Stuart McArthur - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I agree with Kristof and also agree that it is excellent work - some great lines and language, although some were in the TMI category, such as "Undulate your hips" - LOL! - 555
Paul Robinson - January 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Stu.
Adagio - January 27, 2005 - Report this comment
My words trip me up again..ok, I'm at a loss for words, no action, no sunglasses.....maybe I should have just tossed those 5's at you and ran. :D
Johnny D - January 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey, this parody is STILL HERE! Woo-hoo! Paul, as you can see, we're all very happy that we came upon this parody of yours.
Michael Pacholek - January 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, Johnny D is Mr. Happy. Mr. Richard Happy, that is.
Paul Robinson - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Always pleased to receive a big hand from you, JD...Michael...I may have mentioned this somewhere on the site before, but back in 1993 when I was working for H & R Block I did a tax return for a man named "Richard Stroker"....I'm not kidding...yup - "Dick Stroker"...if you are reading this, offense is meant here...but I just can't help but mention it now and then...
Michael Pacholek - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
"Dick Stroker"? Well, my mother once worked for Allstate, and she once had a customer whose name was Abraham Lincoln Lipshitz. She swears it's true. (Allstate? Put in your own "You're in good hands" parody if you like.)
Red Ant - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
I suppose using proper terminology here kept it from being a whatfreaker. Funny, and I may consider re-writing one on this topic that was rejected, though I suspect asterisking 20% of the parody is the only way it will see the light of day here.
Paul Robinson - September 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Red.

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