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Song Parodies -> "Too Far When You Stare"

Original Song Title:

"Scarborough Fair/Canticle"

Original Performer:

Simon & Garfunkel

Parody Song Title:

"Too Far When You Stare"

Parody Written by:

Yolanda DeByle

The Lyrics

You are going too far when you stare.
Just be cool; act like you don't care.
Remember, be someone with great hair.
Otherwise you don't have a prayer.

I’d like to take off her cambric shirt.
(First you should get to know her just a little bit)
Passion rages, can’t waste no time.
(Try saying, “Will you join me for a drink?”)
Without no foreplay that’s too much work
(Oh, no it’s not; just ask about herself)
She’ll say I’ve committed a crime
(You’re unaware of the lesbian rules)

She had invited me to some event.
(Go out with someone who is uglier than you)
Are we dating? Don’t waste my time.
(That way you know they’ll always be true)
But then she ignored me. What had that meant?
(How should I know? Perhaps she just had cramps.)
Won’t she be a true love of mine?

Tell her to weep now I’m a sickie in leather
(And yet you wonder why you’re on probation)
Passion rages, can’t waste no time.
(Jen wails that rage really is not a thrill.)
I’ll gather her hands; tie them both together
(Not too tight or you’ll cause a loss of circulation.)
Then she'll be a true love of mine
Copyright 2009

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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Peregrin - August 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Came here via the 'Random' feature, Yolanda. No comments? I'll leave one. I thought this was a good read, and interesting insight on a subject not often covered. This is a hard song to parody with the parenthetical parts in particular, and I think you did well with it.

It seemed auto-biographical - if it was, I hope you got your true love in the end.

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