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Song Parodies -> "Relief For Your Troubled Assets"

Original Song Title:

"Bridge Over Troubled Water"

Original Performer:

Simon & Garfunkel

Parody Song Title:

"Relief For Your Troubled Assets"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

TARP (the "Troubled Asset Relief Program" or "Troubled Assets Relief Plan") is a program that has been proposed by the US government to purchase assets of troubled financial institutions in order to protect the global financial system ) Goldman Sachs which raised $5bn from Mr Buffett's Berkshire Hathaway plus a further $5bn from institutional investors, will use the money to buy assets either from the US government's planned $700bn bail-out fund or from banks directly.
When you really had it all
When fear has killed your pride and
You are bound to fall
We’re on your side
Oh when times get rough
And credit can’t be found
Here’s relief for your troubled assets
We will buy you out

When you’re down and out,
On old Wall Street
When the market falls so hard
We will rescue you
We’ll take your debt.
When buyers can’t be found
And pain is all around,
Here’s relief for your troubled assets
We will buy you out
Here’s relief for your troubled assets
We will buy you out

Roll on Goldman Sachs
Roll on by
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine.
If you need a friend
I’m sailing right behind.
You’ll take your pick of the troubled assets
It will be so fine
With that cash from old Warren Buffet
It’s a real goldmine

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.9
How Funny: 2.8
Overall Rating: 2.9

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

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Old Paul Robinson - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Hey, Martha...long time, no see...nice job, giving you "5's", although the middle one is more for "Truth" than "Funny", but that's how I always look at these types of pieces. The "Truth", after all, DOES set you free, in it's own inimical way...and THAT gives you the ability to laugh at all the crazy sh*t that passed for "conventional wisdom" for the last 7+ years or so.
Meriadoc - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Somehow the title sounds like a commercial for hemorrhoid cream... ;-)
MarthaDTox - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Hey great to hear from you guys!! Paul .. I have been back in the fray a bit of late writing an Xmas show t - he Credit Crunch Cabaret Its on 9th December if there is any chance u r in London then!! Meriadoc.. given the rather basic physiological theme of many of the parodies on the sitef I can quite see that that was quite a reasonabale assumption to make!
John Barry - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Nice job of working in some of the OS's lyrics.
Paul Robinson - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Ah, Martha...would that it were possible. Los Angeles is about as far away as one can be from London, especially for someone who absolutely LOATHES flying. I'd be willing to bet that "Credit Crunch Cabaret" will be well worth whatever time and effort it would take to see it, though. I actually haven't been writing at all the last two or three months, but I've got a backlog of a couple hundred pieces or so that I just never got around to posting, so I thought I'd start putting some of them up now.
MarthaDtox - October 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks for the comment John ! Paul you must start postng your lyrics now!!
John Jenkins - October 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Excellent stuff, Martha. Very good substitutions.
Glen S - November 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Good write, Martha. Very topical. I like how GM is whining for just this type of thing right about now. I'm glad to see you still around here and writing. How have you been?

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