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Song Parodies -> "I'm White, He's Black..."

Original Song Title:

"I'm Slow, He's Fast....."

Original Performer:

Sesame Street

Parody Song Title:

"I'm White, He's Black..."

Parody Written by:

2LD4U

The Lyrics

Chris Rock: Hello! I am Chris Rock.David Spade: And, I am David Spade.Together: Today, we are going to sing a song about racial differences!
(Intro Music)
DS: I'm white,
CR: I'm black,
DS: I'm rich,
CR: I'm poor.....
Together: And whenever we walk, drink, eat or sleep or spend....
DS: (Pointing to CR) I always get it before he does, I get much more than he does, I always get it better than he does....
CR: And I always get (Riff) something worse!

(Spoken) DS: Oh look it's Donald Trump looking for a new accountant, I bet I am going to get the job!
CR: Yeah, and I will get a poor-ass job mopping the floor.
DT: Congradulations, Mr. Spade you are my new accountant!
DS: Wow! Now what did I tell you!.....

(Start to sing again).
DS: I'm white,
CR: I'm black,
DS: I'm schooled,
CR: I'm not.....
Together: And whenever we walk, eat, drink or sleep or spend....
DS: (Laughing at CR) I always get it before HE does! I always get more than HE does! I always get better than he does!
CR: And I always get (Riff) bad neglect!

(Spoken)
DS: Oh look! A taxi! I bet I will be the one to get it first!
CR: Yeah, he'll leave my black-ass alone!
(Door opens)
DS: Hi cab driver! I bet I get to go home first too!
Middle Eastern Guy: Yes you do!
(MEG takes gun and shoots DS dead)!
CR: Wow! Maybe it ain't so bad being black!

(Start to sing)
CR: I'm black,
MEG: (Points to corpse) He's white,
CR: Alive!
MEG: (Corpse again) He's dead!
Together: And whenever we walk, eat, drink or sleep or spend....
MEG: He gets killed off before YOU do, he gets killed off before YOU do, He gets killed off before you do!
CR: And I get my ass (Riff) out alive!

(CR and MEG walk off arm in arm and the song ends).

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User Comments

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Chris Rock - September 20, 2005 - Report this comment
"You know who the most racist people are? Old black men. Old black men remember what real racism was like. It wasn't any of this 'I can't get a cab' shit. In the old days, the black man was the cab! The white man would jump on his back and say: 'Main Street!'"

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