Why cry? I know why
The craft beers inside my fridge are sadly all gone
Sheer dread! What instead??
Which of my wife's lame beers should I take a chance on?

Try Bud Light, a can's right here
My wife recommends
Try Bud Light, goodbye my beer
This shit isn't real ale and I just can't pretend

Pint size, it draws flies
Staring back at me from the beer mug beside
Not right -- I just might
Be heaving until I've emptied out my insides

(chorus repeats)

Starting to chunder
Think I've made a blunder
A strange skunky bouquet
It ought to be treason
There is no good reason
For beer to taste this way

Though not expensive
It sure tastes offensive
I pour the rest away
Can't stand this non-brew
Sure wish I had gone to
The liquor store today

(chorus repeats)