John Banzhaf sued today
Sued on the 21st of May
Tried to have our fast food taken away
Every single seller swore
He was a son of a whore
He always wants a new car

Wouldn't you like a car?
Wouldn't you like a car, people?
John Banzhaf is a dirty old man
A dirty old man is he.
I better stop this
Before he sues me!

Will he sue Wendy's tomorrow?
Will PETA suck, will they swallow
They don't care 'cause they always get their ways.
Come on come on the time is right
To show the bastard he's in for a fight
"Go veggie! Go veggie!" What a f***ing lie. ("I'll sue you!")

Wouldn't you like a car?
Wouldn't you like a car?
Wouldn't you like a car?
John Banzhaf is a dirty old man
A dirty old man is he.
I better stop this
Before he sues me!

(guitar solo)

Wouldn't you like a car?
Wouldn't you like a car, people?
John Banzhaf is a dirty old man
A dirty old man is he.
I better stop this
Before he sues me!

Now listen all you people
Tell Banzhaf and PETA to kiss your ass.
These people are warned about in the Bible.
Those sinners want a Twinkie Tax.
But they don't know all the facts
And very soon they're gonna be embarrassed.

Eat meat and 'taters like your mama said
Eat it all, eat it all, your mama said
Or else you'll get spanked. It's all in the Bible.
The great Lord after He died
Ate fish. Hey PETA, YOU LIED!
And very soon, you're gonna get your judgement.

No, I'm not gonna put up
With John Banzhaf's sh*t
'Cause time and time again
Those left-wing commies talk more bullsh*t
Come on come on the time is right
This anti-PETAite will fight
I don't want your f***ing car!

(guitar solo)

Wouldn't you like a car?
Wouldn't you like a car?
No I don't want no f***ing car!
John Banzhaf is a dirty old man
A dirty old man is he.
I didn't stop this
Now he's suing me!