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Song Parodies -> "The Expulsion Hearing"

Original Song Title:

"The Trial"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Pink Floyd

Parody Song Title:

"The Expulsion Hearing"

Parody Written by:

Agrimorfee

The Lyrics

from the rock opera "The Pile of Bricks"
[sound effects: squeaky door opening, footsteps, banging of gavel]

[The Dean:]
Good morning, Mr. Superintendant
And welcome to the show
The delinquent who now stands before you
Was caught red-handed reading Playthings
Reading Playthings, it's of a pornographic nature

[Dave:]
I had nothing to do

[The Dean:]
Call the slavedriver!

[Teacher:]
I always knew that he would get caught sooner or later
Look, I have the evidence right here on videotape!
While my back was turned, the nasty little jackass was
Reading "Muddy Bertha"!
Let's Expel him today!

[Dave:]
Lazy, smart in the brain, but I'm just lazy
Wanna go fishing
Why didn't I just keep it locked away?

[Witnesses:]
Lazy, the boy is a moron, and he's lazy

[The Dean:]
Call the snitch!

[The Nerd:]
You little jerk, you're in it now
It's all so hunky-dory!
You could have picked on me less often than you did
But no!
You had to go on all day
Have you broken any noses lately?
In 5 minutes, Davy baby, you'll be goin' down!

[Ma:]
Daaaaaaaaaaaaaavvvvvvvvvve!
Come to Mother, Davy!
How can you be in so much harm?
God, I never thought that you could get in so much trouble!
Did you ever listen to me?
Wait until I get you home!

[Dave:]
Lazy, smart in the brain, but I'm just lazy
This trial is just too slow

[The Dean:]
The question is if it's pornographic at all, or just sex education

[Witnesses:]
Lazy, the boy is a moron, he is lazy!

[Mr. Superintendant:]
The evidence before the Board is utterly implausible
I think that this Teacher should retire!
In all my years of Schooling, I have never heard before
Of porno books being cause of any expulsion at all
The way this boy has suffered, one thing could lead to another
Surely, the school he could disentegrate!
But since, young man, in your peers you've instilled much fear
I sentence you with punishment that causes tears!
Clean the bathroom wall!

[All but Dave:]
Clean the bathroom wall! Clean the bathroom wall!
Clean the bathroom wall!
Clean the bathroom wall!

[sound effects of lit fuse of dynamite, inching closer and closer(!) to the dynamite, then a loud explosion, crash Boom! Bang! The dynamite cache hidden in the boy's bathroom explodes and the Pile of Bricks is distentegrated to rubble!]
Copyright 1985-1995, 2000 AgrimorfeeNext (and final) track: Outside The School

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 1
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 1
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   1
 1
 1
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

wdh - November 15, 2003 - Report this comment
Very good!
Meriadoc - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) A noble effort, but I'm afraid this one kind of left me snoozing. It might have just been the Pink Floyd, tho...
Paul Robinson - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Agrimorfee - DKTOS for now
Phil Alexander - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
I've been listening through The Wall quite a bit this week, considering doing a parody to the whole lot.. This one has got a lot some excellent bits in, but there's quite a few pacing skips.
Adagio - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) DKTOS....ok
Johnny D - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Yikes, that's intense - looks like it took a lot of thought and work to write!
Peregrin - May 26, 2004 - Report this comment
Agri, a lot of hard work went into this, well done
Spaff.com - May 27, 2004 - Report this comment
I put in CD #2 of The Wall to play along as I read this, and skipped to track 12. "Please Mr. Postman" came on. I checked the player and, yes, I had put in The Wall. So I sat here baffled, wondering if I had unwittingly ingested some kind of drug. It was really freaky. I finally realized that I had put the Floyd disc in ON TOP of a sixties compilation already in the player. Sheesh. I thought I was losing my mind.

Anyhoo, I have to agree with Philbo about the pacing, but this was very intriguing overall. Where do I get a copy of "Muddy Bertha"?
Jeff Reuben - May 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Not bad. I'm not a Floyd fan, so I'm a bit biased here. But it is well written.
Claude Prez - May 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, what Spaff said. About "Muddy Bertha", I mean. Heh heh. You clearly have a gift for the unusual.
martha - May 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thus looks like a really clever job on a difficult song...

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