Glinda, why are you dressed for prom?
Glinda, did your hear my rainbow song?
Glinda, why the hell am I now stuck in Oz
Oooh ah, while you ride your bubble ball?

Glinda, thank you for the sentiment
Glinda, please don't think I'm heaven-sent
Glinda, am I gonna be stuck here a long time
Oooh ah, just before I hit my prime?

Hush now Dorothy, baby, don't you cry
Munchkins have come out to sing accolades to you
Munchkins really have nothing better to do
Munchkins wanna dedicate a museum wing
Your house it did fly, and it made the witch sting
We're so glad you made it through the eye of the storm
Oooh Dorothy, Oooh Dorothy
Oh babe, those munchkins are no more than three feet tall!

Glinda, as a witch you're glamorous--to me
Glinda, why's that witch so furious--with me?
Glinda, that green bitch is tearing me apart!
Oooh ah, this trip is worse than Wal-Mart!

Hush now Dorothy, baby, don't you cry
Glinda's now transposed some ruby slippers on you
Keep tight in them, 'cause the witch wants those, too
Glinda's gonna set you on a quest to begin
Glinda says you gotta go without pause
oooh Dorothy, oooh Dorothy
You gotta see the Wizard of Oz

Glinda, you are not too helpful--why?