-> "No Stores Worth Crap"
Original Song Title:
"Nobody Home" (MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"No Stores Worth Crap"
They've got a little Food Court, with no Mickey D's
Got a Gap, and a Pac Sun, but no clothes!
I want some good tunes, but they've got no Hot Topic
They've got no good food stands that sell roasted peanuts
Got no FYE at all
Got thirteen off-brands of sh*t, in the stores I CAN chose from
They've got a Zales Jewles
But I want something cool!
Like American Eagle, or maybe a Virgin****
And this is the stright rap!:
When I looked at their stores
I found myself wanting more
But there's no stores worth crap...
They've got the obligatory "preppies" here
And the inevitable "scene kids" too
All down the walkways of this crap-hole, with nothing to do!
They've got "happy juice" stains on the toilets!
They've got a janitor who seems quite insane
They've got some vending machines,
To drive all the health nuts away...
I've gone bored, with shopping here
And I just might shed me some tears!
But I've got no one to cry to...
Oooh, man, this place is a trap!
[sound of a man issuing a survey saying "surprise!" in an irritable tone, and then asking the oblivous Floyd if he would like to complete a survey.]
..There's still no stores worth crap
I've got a urge to leave this mall...
Can't believe I...came at all...
[more TV noise in the background. An episode of "Lost" can be heard, with sounds of dialouge, and then the sound of the plane crash...]
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