I was drinkin' some wine down at a place called "The Vine"
With a drunk called Mad Dog Drew
Then in walked a man with a list in his hand
Lookin' to enroll you know who
He said "You over there with the Thunderbird stare
Wanna try to improve?
'Cause you're a man who drinks and this here A.A. thing, you
Know it might be good for you"

I was drunk and searchin' for my wine
Shaking like a washing machine
But he was cleaned and preened and real sober, Lord
Pointing that list at me
I just said "Save your breath mister, while I visit the pisser
Her comes a rumble-ing spew
And I know you don't know me but I'm 'bout to unload one
And I'm aimed right at you"

And he said "You need 12 steps, you need 12 steps mister"
Just as I stepped to the door
"You need 12 steps, you need 12 steps mister"
But I couldn't hold it no more

Oh well the man turned away as I began to spray
And the vomit spewed over the floor
And it sure was some fun, watching him run
Howling straight down on thirty-fourth
Well I turned and laughed at Mad Dog Drew
Said "That's the third one this week so far"
And we could hear him screamin' a mile away
As we headed back towards the bar

"Gimme three sips, gimme three sips mister
Gimme three sips won't you please
Gimme three sips, gimme three sips mister
'Cause after all I pay your lease"

(I'm gonna have to sleep in the Dodge)