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Song Parodies -> "Brand Me ( Scar Me Fine, Girl ! )"

Original Song Title:

"Brandy ( You're A Fine Girl )"

Original Performer:

Looking Glass

Parody Song Title:

"Brand Me ( Scar Me Fine, Girl ! )"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

Fare thee well, Buffy The Vampire Slayer...
There's a short, kind of kinky way
To enhance, your body art display
It's what ranchers, use to keep away
The rustlers of their cows

And there's a girl, she's in Provincetown
And she works, laying hot steel down
Clients ask her, for a scar that's brown
She burns them, frisky and fine

Her clients say "Brand me!
Scar me fine, girl!
Make a good stripe I can see!
Yeah you fry - with steel and tailored - artistry!"

And she, wears a gothic chain
Made of dungeon iron from a house of pain
A locket, that bears the name
Of a man that she once loved

He came, on a winter's day
Wearing black, and shades of grey
But he made it clear, he could not stay,
His coffin was his home

He used to say "Brand me!
Scar me fine, girl!
Make a good stripe I can see!
But my life, my love and my lady - is Buffy"

Oh yeah, she used to watch his eyes
When he told his tales so gorey
She could feel the darkness all around
She saw its gothic glory
But he had always made things up
Lord, he was a lying man
But frankly, she just did not - give a damn!

At night, other shops close down -
Not hers, that's when she comes around
To spread her burning pain around
You'll hear her clients say:

You'll hear them say "Brand me!
Scar me fine, girl!
Make a good stripe I can see!
You're my life, my love, and my lady - burn me please!"

You'll hear them say "Brand me!
Scar me fine, girl!
Make a good stripe I can see!
Make me grovel, beg and plead for - third degree!"

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

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Adagio - October 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Good read, Johnny.
Johnny D - October 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Thanks Adagio!
Guy - October 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Great write Johnny D. Did I inspire this?
Johnny D - October 24, 2003 - Report this comment
Yes you did indeed, Guy, and thanks very much!
Rick D - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS--and I thought this was a btvs story
Johnny D - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Rick! Nope, it's not a "real" Buffy story (so far as I know, I didn't watch much of that show) ...... I just sleazed and exploited a quasi-goth pseudo-BTVS motif here as an excuse for slapping a parody together around the title "Brand Me ( Scar Me Fine, Girl ! )", that's all.
Meriadoc - August 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Just ran across this one Johnny, and thought it should get a new vote! Good job and perfect pacing. (And it sounds more like Malcolm inspired it, hee hee).
Jordan (Mike Armstrong) - September 15, 2006 - Report this comment
I was thinking of doing a parody to this song and wanted to see how it'd been done before and ran across yours. This is a really good barometer for me at how your parody writing skills have grown. This one is great as are the rest of them, but you seem to be able to get more into a parody nowadays and that's something we definitely aspire to do... not having lines that don't cause a reaction, things like that. ANYWHO!! Great job.

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