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Song Parodies -> "Walmart acquires the Stairway to Heaven (NASD: WMSH) from God for $35Bln cash and stock"

Original Song Title:

"Stairway To Heaven"

Original Performer:

Led Zepplin

Parody Song Title:

"Walmart acquires the Stairway to Heaven (NASD: WMSH) from God for $35Bln cash and stock"

Parody Written by:

Laurence Dunne

The Lyrics

WalMart Managers know what they buy turns to gold,
So they're buying the stairway to heaven
If the deal goes to plan, with no government ban
God will just be a WalMart Subsidiary
Ooh, ooh, So they're buying the stairway to heaven

When they get it i'm told, there's eternity sold
ten percent off for veterans and seniors
There's a lane to the left, for those ten sins or less
Two-for-one on the novelty grim reapers
Ooh, it will trade on Nasdaq
Ooh, can I buy my life back

There's a songbird who sings, he has ten different rings
And the batteries are even included
K-Mart, Target and Sams, think the deal should not stand
But God wants it so they are deluded
Ooh, and their stock's up seven
Ooh, make a deal for heaven

Walgreens now wants to deal with the devil for hell
To compete during the winter season
Beelzebub's holding out, Lucifer has some doubt
Maybe Satan can help them see reason

If there's a rattle in your soul now, don't be alarmed now
Walmart just installed a GPS
Cause there are two roads you can go down, and here's the low-down
Walmart wants to know which you'll select
Ohhh, yeah they want to track you

And as we wind on down the road
Here comes the stairway that's been sold
It's Ten lanes wide and made of gold
Price cuts are written up in bold
For ten bucks we'll remove your lust
This will prevent you getting bust
All our competitors are fussed
and Walmart stock now is a must

Cause they're buying the stairway to heaven

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   6
 7
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Adagio - November 01, 2003 - Report this comment
I really enjoyed it! That's a new slant on things.
Johnny D - November 01, 2003 - Report this comment
Brilliant and funny!
Static - November 01, 2003 - Report this comment
555 hahaha
Spaff.com - November 11, 2003 - Report this comment
Outstanding title! And the rest of the parody lives up to it.
Chris Wolvie - April 26, 2009 - Report this comment
Ve-e-e-e-e-e-ery in-n-n-n-nteresting. I was WONDERING why my managers told me the new skylight was for a now escalator. (badum tish) 5s...out of 5s!

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