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Song Parodies -> "(It's On My) Rider"

Original Song Title:

"Traveling Riverside Blues"

Original Performer:

Led Zeppelin

Parody Song Title:

"(It's On My) Rider"

Parody Written by:

McKludge

The Lyrics

A rider is an addition to a performer's contract specifying what the performer will need. Most are simple, but some performers are very demanding... DKTOS?: find it here but it doesn't contain one of the stanzas before the break
Yeah
That's right

Asked promoter, let them play my club
He said, "They’re free in 3 weeks but now, here’s the rub"

Well you know these babies, they’re well known for their conceit
He said they got this rider, and it’s pretty tough to meet

Now, I’ll take your number, fax their rider to your place
It’s really long, get more paper, just in case, yeah
I know it reads like they were, just really freaking high
But if you ignore it, you bet you’ll kiss your show goodbye

Get a doctor, tell him, tell him be on call
Plus a Rabbi and a shrine to St. Paul
Scented candles, unfiltered cigarettes
They won’t play for your concert, ‘til the rider’s been met

Eight Frappachinos, on the rider
’86 Bordeaux, on the rider
Echinacea and hard cider
It’s on page sixteen, just read the rider

I know you’re thinking that this rider makes no sense
But ‘cha better just do what it says, and don’t spare no expense
When you buy flowers make sure, no chrysanthemums please
Keep the drummer’s room, at eighty degrees

Spoken: Oh yeah, they’ll need a full kitchen

Autograph from Tom Brady
A humongous bamboo wind chime
And get the Real Slim Shady
With a half dozen pantomimes

Speakers so loud make the devil soil his pants
Twenty hookers, with double-D implants
Amp that goes to eleven, like the dude from Spinal Tap

Spoken: I think you know the dude that I’m talking about

And you better stack those speakers high
And keep the stage clear ‘cause they like to dance
Yeah, it’s a hard rider

Hot wings from Beef O’Brady’s
Everything in this rider you’ll provide, yeah
Make sure the front steps are lined with gold
Hummus and tamarasalata, Froot Loops and Cap’n Crunch
And some Kellogg’s Sugar Pops…
for some examples of wacky contract riders, look here

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   14
 14
 14
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - May 06, 2007 - Report this comment
many wonderful lines and a unique concept
Chris Pollman - May 07, 2007 - Report this comment
555 green M&Ms
Agrimorfee - May 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent idea, McKludge, and very well done...consider this for Song of the Month? (see message board)
Chris Bodily TM - June 10, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wow! What a song choice, what a concept, awesome execution, outrageous demands... This is a masterpiece right here. And you're buying a Stairway to SOTM. 555
Agrimorfee - June 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) You have some stiff competition, but this will definitely be in my top 5!
Peter Andersson - June 16, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - I like list parodies, and this one was unique (surprisingly enough).
Max Power - June 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Greener
stuart mcarthur - June 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Led Zeppelin? I should know the OS, but again youtube has dumped it due to copyright - but the theme and the lines were great, McKludge - you just KNOW they'll be wanting Froot Loops - that should be a line in the standard contract - and if I was the hotel, I would read the drummer's "80 degrees" requirement as Celsius - 555
McKludge - June 26, 2007 - Report this comment
You tube must have moved it, or it dropped and was reloaded. The OS can be found here now
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQ2Vv2xZ5pc
bobpiecheese - June 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Now THAT is an original concept. Great work McKludge!
Matthias - June 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Awesome job McKludge. Annoying OS, but an awesome parody!
wannabemustangjockey - June 29, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Mmm, Froot Loops and Cap'n Crunch. Breakfast of Champions -- and kooky music performers! Pretty crazy parody.
The Charnstar - June 29, 2007 - Report this comment
LOL! Practically the same thing Stu said. 5-5-5
Phil Alexander - June 29, 2007 - Report this comment
er... "tamarasalata"? (isn't that a Bob Marley song?)
But a great (and eminently believable) list of demands :-D
Below Average Dave - June 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I think you a very talented writer. . .and I think you are probably really good at comedy too. . .but I just didn't laugh much here. . .but good write none the less
Jason - June 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Very good!, (For some reason the security code is TUT?!?!?!)
Kristof Robertson - June 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As an eminent Amiright voter and commenter, my demands are thus. A dwarf dressed as Braveheart serving me Beluga and Vegimite sandwiches (no crusts please) while Jennifer Connelly pours a vintage 68 Chateau Du Gatorade down my lazyass throat. ;-) Seriously good fun, mate. 555
Jack Wilson - June 30, 2007 - Report this comment
Awesome parody and OS, 5s!
Chris Frederick - July 01, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Nice. This OS's style makes it tough to pace, and it looks like you did a good job of it.
McKludge - July 02, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks to all who voted, particularly

Agri - Thanks for the SOTM nomination and for the third place vote.

Chris - If only I could buy the talent to win SOTM :-)

Peter - Thanks for the second place vote

Stuart - The OS was never officially released until the Remasters box set, probably why you don't recall it.

Phil - Tamarasalata is a Greek disk of fish roe, lemon juice, onion, garlic, and olive oil. And it sounds funny, too.

Kristof - Will you settle for the Travelocity gnome, a Fluffernutter, and a waitress with a gin and tonic?

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