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Song Parodies -> "Staircase To 'Heaven' ('the jewelry store')"

Original Song Title:

"Stairway To Heaven"

Original Performer:

Led Zeppelin

Parody Song Title:

"Staircase To 'Heaven' ('the jewelry store')"

Parody Written by:

Lyrica H.

The Lyrics

TM- (I found many different lyric versions for STH on the web, I used the one from (this poem is dedicated to my sister Louise who always loves "sparkly" things, -- and she won a $6000 diamond!)(although STH is a spiritual song, I made this materialistic)- (There's a Jewelry Store named "Heaven", located at Bramalea City Centre Shopping Mall, Brampton, Ontario, Canada, (8 miles northwest of Toronto)
STAIRCASE TO "HEAVEN" ("the jewelry store")

(the best guitar intro is playing on the store music)
(the best singer in her world is singing)

There's a Lady we know, what's 'on sale' she is sold,
signed a shop credit contract at "Heaven",
when she gets there she knows if the store has been closed,
she'll get in anyway with her password.

Whu ho! she's buying up a staircase to "Heaven"

there's a sign on the door, elevator to floor,
her mind says one thing, but her heart's leaning,
what's free? have a good look, when you purchase some things,
the fine print is not always what's written.

Woah, it makes me wander
Woah, it makes me wander

there's deals here to get, says "Apollo", be my guest,
bargain for spender is liberating,
in the mirror, wearing earrings, reflection of me,
through the glass - stares of those who stand browsing.

Woah! it makes me wander
Woah! it really makes me wander

and it's tendered that soon when the light's flashing blue
then use card swiper, rings are in season,
and a new queue will form outside of the store
but hey, we got here first, so we're laughin'.

if there's a buzzing in your cellphone, then let your friend know
about the Spring Clean Sale that She dreamed,
cash or credit card you can buy on; exchange, no refund,
there's still time, change your mind, run along.

and it makes me wander

you're hemming and hawing; the luster you're pawing, you'll owe,
gotta pay the piper, face muzak,
dear customer you know this costume jewelry's for show,
up the staircase is gold, the real thing.

(the most beautiful steal guitar strings in the store)

and as she wanders down each row
watery eyes starry from glow
there walks a salesperson in tow
who shines white teeth, if you got dough
how your outfit this colour goes
and if you tune out it's not hard
a silver spoon would keep cost low
when all is said and done is all
to buy a rock and not a bowl !

(brace-let yourself for this!)
she's buying up a staircase to "Heaven".

(end of the line-up!)
(p.s. "Apollo" is the god of the west)
© Lyrica H-------,

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   4

User Comments

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Johnny D - April 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Quite well done, indeed.
Royce Miller - April 01, 2005 - Report this comment
I agree with Johnny D. And it is confusing, how many different lyric postings there are for this song, on the internet. Bottom line, anyone who attempts this original song is okay in my book.
Lyrica H. - April 23, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi *:) I'm the writer of this...just a note to let you know that: the word "steal" should be spelled "steel", however at this price, it was a "steal". LoL

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