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Song Parodies -> "Painful Erection"

Original Song Title:

"Rainbow Connection"

Original Performer:

Kermit The Frog

Parody Song Title:

"Painful Erection"

Parody Written by:

Invisible Boy

The Lyrics

Painful Erection

I swallowed too many
Tabs of Cialis
And now things aren’t going well
People are staring
I’m walking bent-over
And still I continue to swell

It feels so wrong to have this diamond-cutter
Out on display in my yard

Trying to hide it
This painful erection
Too turgid, too rigid, too hard

Why did my girlfriend start
Her constant complaining
Who did she expect…John Holmes ?
Sure, I’m a “minute-man”
But I compensated
With flowers, with calls, with poems

Much of our dating
Is her “master” baiting
I need to change her old ways

So, I’ll maintain it
This painful erection
For minutes, for hours, for days

Have you tried very hard
To postpone the moment
By thinking of baseball stats…
Well, in my condition
That ploy is not needed
Think instead of baseball bats…

Sure, I’m a frog and well…she is a piggy
Still I am up for this scene

Now she’s “Miss Jiggy”
Thanks… painful erection
So potent, so virile, so green !


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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   15

User Comments

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alvin - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
lol...funny enough using a sesame street song for this.....but i about died when i realized it was about kermit and piggy...what K lacks in manhood dimensions he makes up for with that tongue...if i'm still laughing in 4 hours i'd better see a doctor
AFW - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
Like Alvin says...this made me laugh, really hard... Lots of great lines and jokes in here
Jack Wilson - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
You ARE the master of your domain? LOL 5s
Christy McDaniel - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
"Rainbow Connection" is actually a "Muppet Movie" song.
Invisible Boy - January 05, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks alvin, AFW and Jack. Christy...thanks for pointing that out. I actually thought the song was from Citizen Kane (the musical)
McKludge - January 05, 2008 - Report this comment
This one begs for recording, if you can pull off the Kermit voice. Hell, I'd even try it if you don't want to.
Guy - March 22, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4P) IB - Can't go wrong with Muppets. The "Much of our dating" verse is over the top. Lots of great refs and subs make this one quite worthy of the read. Well done.
Matthias - March 28, 2008 - Report this comment
Oh my god Invisible Boy. This one was just over the top crazy. Kermit the Frog with penis pills... Talk about crazy. At first I thought it was just a regular guy, then you added the whole Kermit thing and moved this from a B level parody all the way up to an A+.
Red Ant - April 06, 2008 - Report this comment
McKludge said what I was going to... also the "basball bats/...stats" rhyme pair was hilarious. Very well done, IB. 555
Agrimorfee - April 08, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) A nasty twist on a beautiful song is always welcomed...but you forgot the bridge: "All of us under it's spell/You know that it's probably magic."
bobpiecheese - April 10, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) The images that come to mind with this parody are not pleasant. Thus, you get straight 5's for cacking me up and grossing me out simultaneously!
Johnny D - April 10, 2008 - Report this comment
LOL 555 LOL 555 LOL 555 !!!
Johnny D - April 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Here's a possible bridge:

Awesome, a thunderous swell!
You know that it's throbbingly massive!

Below Average Dave - April 16, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) What can I say, just unbelievably funny IB. . .wow.
stuart mcarthur - April 16, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) such are the ironies of amiright that you're becoming a victim of your own talent, IB - although there were very clever bits as usual, I'm starting to expect brilliance from you every time - still very funny, esp. in its context - 555

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