Song Parodies -> Painful Erection
| Original Song Title: | "Rainbow Connection" |
| Original Performer: | Kermit The Frog |
| Parody Song Title: | "Painful Erection" |
| Parody Written by: | Invisible Boy |
Painful Erection
I swallowed too many
Tabs of Cialis
And now things aren’t going well
People are staring
I’m walking bent-over
And still I continue to swell
It feels so wrong to have this diamond-cutter
Out on display in my yard
Trying to hide it
This painful erection
Too turgid, too rigid, too hard
Why did my girlfriend start
Her constant complaining
Who did she expect…John Holmes ?
Sure, I’m a “minute-man”
But I compensated
With flowers, with calls, with poems
Much of our dating
Is her “master” baiting
I need to change her old ways
So, I’ll maintain it
This painful erection
For minutes, for hours, for days
Have you tried very hard
To postpone the moment
By thinking of baseball stats…
Well, in my condition
That ploy is not needed
Think instead of baseball bats…
Sure, I’m a frog and well…she is a piggy
Still I am up for this scene
Now she’s “Miss Jiggy”
Thanks… painful erection
So potent, so virile, so green !
IB
I swallowed too many
Tabs of Cialis
And now things aren’t going well
People are staring
I’m walking bent-over
And still I continue to swell
It feels so wrong to have this diamond-cutter
Out on display in my yard
Trying to hide it
This painful erection
Too turgid, too rigid, too hard
Why did my girlfriend start
Her constant complaining
Who did she expect…John Holmes ?
Sure, I’m a “minute-man”
But I compensated
With flowers, with calls, with poems
Much of our dating
Is her “master” baiting
I need to change her old ways
So, I’ll maintain it
This painful erection
For minutes, for hours, for days
Have you tried very hard
To postpone the moment
By thinking of baseball stats…
Well, in my condition
That ploy is not needed
Think instead of baseball bats…
Sure, I’m a frog and well…she is a piggy
Still I am up for this scene
Now she’s “Miss Jiggy”
Thanks… painful erection
So potent, so virile, so green !
IB
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User Comments Follow...
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lol...funny enough using a sesame street song for this.....but i about died when i realized it was about kermit and piggy...what K lacks in manhood dimensions he makes up for with that tongue...if i'm still laughing in 4 hours i'd better see a doctor
Like Alvin says...this made me laugh, really hard...
Lots of great lines and jokes in here
You ARE the master of your domain? LOL 5s
"Rainbow Connection" is actually a "Muppet Movie" song.
Thanks alvin, AFW and Jack.
Christy...thanks for pointing that out. I actually thought the song was from Citizen Kane (the musical)
This one begs for recording, if you can pull off the Kermit voice. Hell, I'd even try it if you don't want to.
(ABC4P) IB - Can't go wrong with Muppets. The "Much of our dating" verse is over the top. Lots of great refs and subs make this one quite worthy of the read. Well done.
Oh my god Invisible Boy. This one was just over the top crazy. Kermit the Frog with penis pills... Talk about crazy. At first I thought it was just a regular guy, then you added the whole Kermit thing and moved this from a B level parody all the way up to an A+.
McKludge said what I was going to... also the "basball bats/...stats" rhyme pair was hilarious. Very well done, IB. 555
(ABC) A nasty twist on a beautiful song is always welcomed...but you forgot the bridge: "All of us under it's spell/You know that it's probably magic."
(ABC4) The images that come to mind with this parody are not pleasant. Thus, you get straight 5's for cacking me up and grossing me out simultaneously!
LOL 555 LOL 555 LOL 555 !!!
Here's a possible bridge:
Awesome, a thunderous swell!
You know that it's throbbingly massive!
Awesome, a thunderous swell!
You know that it's throbbingly massive!
(ABC) What can I say, just unbelievably funny IB. . .wow.
(ABC4) such are the ironies of amiright that you're becoming a victim of your own talent, IB - although there were very clever bits as usual, I'm starting to expect brilliance from you every time - still very funny, esp. in its context - 555
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