-> "Hot Rod Lincoln"
Original Song Title:
"Hot Pod Racer"
Parody Song Title:
"Hot Rod Lincoln"
Parody Written by:
My mamma said "Son, I get so scared and afraid
each time you race in that pod you made"
Have you heard the story of the Boonta Eve race
where a kid and a Dug were setting the pace?
That story is true, I can tell you that,
cuz I was drivin that twin-engine jet.
With Radon-Ulzer engines that I really improved
and augmented injectors, that thing could move!
Eight fans in the compressor, and used'em all,
but too much tradium fuel and it just might stall.
With a movable nozzle and dual air spills...
The triple air scoops make cornering a thrill.
As the race started, I WOULD've done fine,
except that Dug messsed with my fuel line.
So I left the grid later than the rest,
but when it came to speed I was simply the best.
With the engines and the Force both at my will,
I was passing pods like they were standin' still.
It wasn't long till I caught up with the Dug.
He had crashed most opponents and was lookin' smug.
He was aggressive but I didn't fear HIM,
through canyons and caves I slowly closed in.
The other podracers were left far behind
(except Mars Guo's, which almost crashed into mine)
but once in the open desert, whopee!,
I set the augmentor to full A.B.
Well I wound it up to six hundred and ten,
and was actually winning for a while, but then
the Dug started getting nasty and all,
pushing and shoving me towards the canyon wall.
Up the service ramp, "Oh now I'm dead"
with cones and markers bouncing overhead.
Went up, then down. Through the air I sped.
With a thrust-vectored landing, I was (again) ahead.
Under stone arches which I never struck,
I was almost running out of luck.
A valve flew off, left engine stalled!
(For this, I wanted the d*mn Dug's balls!)
Smoke was coming from out of the side
and Sebulba was gaining, while hard I tried
to compensate the thrust and gas.
I put out the fire and did a fuel bypass.
My pod met his and again he shoved it,
but we stuck together!(Man, the crowd just loved it).
I upped the thrust, the two pods in a lock,
but the Dug broke loose and flew into a rock.
All of a sudden, the crowd was roarin',
my friends were cheering, Jabba a-snorin'.
Victory was sweet but Watto didn't taste her,
bwcause I had WON with my new podracer.
So they freed me. I then left my mom.
Joined the Jedi and I was gone.
But I knew I'd be back to free and embrace her
all because I won in my HOT... POD... RACER!
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|How Funny: ||3.3|
|Overall Rating: ||3.1|
|Total Votes: ||7|
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