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Song Parodies -> "Enterprise: It Sucks"

Original Song Title:

"Court and Spark"

Original Performer:

Joni Mitchell

Parody Song Title:

"Enterprise: It Sucks"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Another Joni Mitchell song; another parody lambasting that sad dog of a show that now represents the once great "Star Trek" franchise, "Enterprise"...
In my TV guide
there was this show
"Enterprise", said "Oh
I really like that program"
Stories always seem to have an arc
Liked all their players
from Worff to Spock

So I clicked on the "Remote" box
but this is strange;
a boring scene is happening
Story strains and lumbers
Now I hear these stupid lines from
from this dork, "Archer"
Don't think this is a program
To watch; No, Sir

I hate to be unkind
But I don't think this show
is at all worth my time
It seems totally boring; I sighed
That's not a good sign

"Writers must be cretins", I said
They must not have brains
Mush is in their heads
This is so inane
Grabbed the remote
and vaporized this show
It stunk so completely
Completely; phew!

The characters on this program were so bland
I could scream
And the more I watched them
well, the more it peeved me
I just had to let go of "Enterprise"
Program must have awful ratings

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Know 1 can hear you dream - October 01, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS but I'll agree, as you can see from my take on the subject:
Paul Robinson - October 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, know 1 - I'll take a look at it when I get back from some errands later on today.
alvin rhodes - October 01, 2004 - Report this comment
funny one...ol' joni's sure takin' her lumps this week, ain't she ?
Johnny D - October 01, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but I agree with most of your thesis....although, T'Pol is rather easy to look at, especially when they show her in topless-nipple-profile-silhouette, or side-boobular-curvosity. See? I can find something good to say about "Enterprise".
Paul Robinson - October 01, 2004 - Report this comment
alvin - Thanks - yes, it seems you & I have re-discovered that treasure trove that is J. Mitchell's older songs catalogue. Fun stuff to work with, I think, even if not all that many folks know them these days...JD - you have a point there - actually you have a pair of points there - or maybe I should say Jolene Blalock (I think that's her name) has a pair of points there...and, yes pretty good ones, too. But the rest of the show....dreckkkkarious stuff...
pickle - October 03, 2004 - Report this comment
I really hate it when fantasy shows get into soap-opera territory, which Enterprise seems to be. Charmed does it and so has Angel to a degree.
Paul Robinson - October 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, pickle.
Spock - October 04, 2004 - Report this comment
The new "Enterprise" Trek is rather quite irregular but none-the-less does seem to relate well to logic, but alas it is not the hell my version.
Paul Robinson - October 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Spock - was referencing the overall "Trek Franchise" there.
2Eagle - October 13, 2004 - Report this comment
They lost me a long time ago. I would rather see re runs of the original series.

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