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Song Parodies -> "I Do Not Like This Liver"

Original Song Title:

"River"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Joni Mitchell

Parody Song Title:

"I Do Not Like This Liver"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Mangling yet another of Joni Mitchell's beautiful songs from her early 1970's classic album, "Blue", which is an album I really like, by the way...And, no, I don't eat liver...
It's time to eat dinner
I do not mind peas
I like mashed potatoes
and I enjoy roast beef
But I do not like this liver
that I see on my plate now

It looks like shoe leather
the smell is obscene
and it will taste real gross and crummy
Like something fished from a latrine
No, I do not like this liver...
take this plate away now, hon
I really wish this liver was long gone
My gag reflex does rrii-iii-iii-iiiisse
No, I do not like this liver
take this plate away now, hon...
remove it from my sight

It's fried and disgusting
my taste buds are not pleased
This stuff is just so awful
If I eat I'll surely heave
Oh, I will not eat this liver
why did you make it, hon?
I could eat some ham, though
or pot roast - if we had
Or some meat loaf with brown gravy
that would make me really glad
But I will not eat this liver
make it go away now, hon
This liver on my dish looks like scum
I did not like this sur-prriii-iii-iiiiise
Yo - don't ever give me liver
Won't eat this; it would not be wise
It's already drawing flies

So, next time you make dinner
Dear, please keep this in mind
that whatever you cook, dear
if I don't like it I'll whine
I will not eat this liver
take this plate away now......
hon...

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   8
 8
 8
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
liver haters of america...step forward and be counted
Red Ant - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
"Yo - don't ever give me liver" heh heh heh. Since I'm in a sea of DKTOS today I trusted you on the pacing as this is funny and I join Alvin in the count. 5s.
carol - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
eat liver I will not 555
Paul Robinson - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
alvin, Red and carol...Thanks! Looks like I struck a chord among those who shiver at even the thought of eating liver...Red - Yeah, I liked the "Yo" in there...especially as a transition coming off the rising sustained notes at the end of the previous line...
Adagio - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
This is really good, Paul. Hmm...maybe you would like it better the way they had it on "Dances With Wolves". He killed a buffalo, so was 'honored' by having the raw liver torn out and presented to him to eat...lol...eat hearty! Oh....certainly 5's, even without 'the fly'. Hate to tell you, I kind of like liver...chicken liver especially...yummmm!
Paul Robinson - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Pat - Yeah, I didn't think the "Fly" part would translate well to the written version without an extensive and overly-complicated explanation of the reference...even I wouldn't want to try to do that...lol...and, Hey...no problem...you can have MINE...
Adagio - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
It's a deal, Paul.
Larry Hensley - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but this was really funny. Liver stinks!
Paul Robinson - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry ~ ~ ~ And...I agree...
Rick C - December 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Great idea and de-liver-y. Joni's one of my faves. 555
Paul Robinson - December 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Rick C - A belated "Thanks!" ~ ~ ~

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