Like Phil Spector murdered "The Winding Road",
I conquered Spain, I conquered Spain
Like a hipster listens to Depeche Mode,
I conquered Spain, I conquered Spain

And we rule over subjects like our caliphate,
But we're headin' for Tours, for our new state
Conquering al-Andalus,
Considered nearly scand'lous,
Headin' for France via Pyrenees

Like an ant farm munching on ham and rye,
We battle on, we battle on,
Like cholesterol in a grease stir-fry,
We're all among, we're all among

And we harry the dhimmis and invent the oud,
If we don't see Bordeaux, ruling Spain's still good **
Martel won't take it lightly,
Casualties add nightly,
Retreat and try again some other time

And I'm gonna go there free
Just like Noel, Liam and a band named Blur
We're rivals now, we're rivals now
Wait till 1492, change occurs
Unconquered, how? Unconquered, how?
Oh, I know reconquistas set us back a bit,
But we'll keep Morocco, focus on it
If we had battled my way,
We could have fought to Taipei!
No one listened so hist'ry passed us by