Well the South side of Tok-yo is the home of a chef of sushi
And if you go down there you better just not stare at Yoshido Yamaguchi
Now Yoshido want no trouble
Ya see, he stand about five foot four
Although downtown ladies called him little monster,
All the men just called him short

(CHORUS 1)
And he's sad, sad Yoshido
Saddest man in To-ky-o
Sadder than Swan in a thong,
Lonlier than a homeless dog
(END CHORUS 1)

Now Yoshido, he a sushi chef,
And he like his dirty apron,
And he likes to put his wooden chopsticks
In everybody's food
He got a beat-up Mitsubishi
He got a little golf cart too
He got 32 rocks in his pocket for luck
He got a quarter in his shoe
(REPEAT CHORUS 1)

Now Friday, as the weekday goes,
Yoshido cookin' mice
And sittin' on the john was a girl named Swan
And she was eating some white rice
Well he cast his eyes upon her
And trouble soon began
Yoshido soon learned a lesson 'bout a-messin' with
A girl who "Looka like a man"
(REPEAT CHORUS 1)

Now those those two peeps took to fightin'
And they them from the floor
Nine months later, Swan went into labor,
And had a baby dinosaur

(CHORUS 2)
Now he's glad, glad Yoshido
Gladdest man in To-ky-o
Gladder than this here song
Happier than a happy dog
(END CHORUS 2)
(REPEAT CHORUS 2)

Yeah, he's gladder than this here song,
Happier than a happy dog