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Song Parodies -> "You Don't Play No Ball-In-Hand"

Original Song Title:

"You Don't Mess Around With Jim"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Jim Croce

Parody Song Title:

"You Don't Play No Ball-In-Hand"

Parody Written by:

Fred Snider

The Lyrics

They changed the rules of pool, so when you miss your ball or scratch, your opponent can put the cue ball absolutely anywhere on the table, even if you scratch on the 8-ball. It's like playing with a 3 year-old. I was teaching a young woman to play the old way, & made my very first triple combo!
Superman's got his Krypton,
Achiellies has his heel,
Frederic Ross Snider is a real fast talker,
But there's some that call him "shlameel".
Yeah, he's small & smart,
Like a fox's fart,
But he's sharper than a carpet tack,
And when the old folks can't get something right,
You know they all give Fred a crack!
And he will always say, "Jack, no no",
You don't play no ball in hand,
You don't leave the spot ball in,
You don't pull the cue ball from an 8 ball scratch.
And you just take it on the chin!
Doot dootle doot doot, you didn't win!
Out of just south of nowhere came a pool sharp,
He said I'm giving you my advice,
If you just shoot the ball it'll go in,
But I ain't gonna tel you twice.
She didn't listen to him & she missed the shot,
But she sure had a lot of fun,
And when the sharpie at down,
He had a pitiful frown,
But a smile when it was done.
Son of a gun! Tell us who won!
And Freddie had to say, "Jack, no no."
( Chorus )
Well a hush fell over the pool room,
Freddie was shooting behind his back,
And when the triple mambo combo went in anyway,
They all about had a heart attack.
Yeah, he told about 100 people,
And he e-mailed a couple more,
And you better believe that the soakers in the hot tub,
Fell asleep & began to snore!
Oy, what a bore! We heard it before!
And now they have to say, "Jack, no no."
( Chorus )
Yeah, Rjon got his back,
Stop trying to tell Fred's learnin' chick what to do,
Even if you do got a Ph.d in Pool Cue,
Hmm, hmm.
Yeah,.... ( Chorus )
http://sites.google com/site/myfreelyrics I do these parodies at karaoke night. I put adult humor & partials on the other website.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   2
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Old Man Ribber - October 17, 2009 - Report this comment
That's Trouble with a capital T...and that rhymes with P...and that stands for....PERFECT, Fred. :)

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