doctor, my size has caused me fear
i'm ashamed to show my rear
i can't hide it...could it be my thyroid gland ?

i have ate all that i could
guess my appetite was good
i must diet...you must help me if you can

doctor, my size...tell me what is wrong
was i unwise ?...was my mouth open for too long ?

cause i have made food my whole world
and as each double chin unfurled
i've been eating in a pretty constant stream
and i eat just what i will
i never noticed it until...i got this swelling
and my pants strained at the seams

doctor, my size...i'm too fat, you see
don't wanna die...don't tell me its too late for me

doctor, my size...can't believe my thighs
is this the price...for being such a big boned guy ?