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Song Parodies -> "I Am Turkey"

Original Song Title:

"I Am Woman"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Helen Reddy

Parody Song Title:

"I Am Turkey"

Parody Written by:

Alvin Rhodes

The Lyrics

happy thanksgiving, everybody !
i was turkey...but no more
frozen at the grocery store
i had fattened up...then life came to an end
now i'm just a dinner chore...and in two weeks i'll be ignored
but at christmas time, they reignite the trend

oh...breast, drums and thighs
and a wishbone to obtain
yes, i paid the price
cause poundage i had gained
was a fat dude...i...was...a...hefty thing
now i'm stuffed...and served with vegetables
i am turkey

you can broil but never bake me
cause i'd never turn out flaky
you must roast me long...to reach that golden goal
but if i'm raw, just cook me longer
if i'm bland, just spice me stronger
in the kitchen, i'll fulfill my final role

a feast...giant size
of all courses, i'm the main
by the pound, you play the price
the butcher will explain
was a fat dude...i... was...a...hefty thing
now i'm stuffed...and served with vegetables
i am turkey

i was turkey...on death row
then i finally had to go
seems i'll feed you humans all across the land
now a rooster's born to crow
and a hen makes embryos
but a turkey's only destined for the pan

its sad, my demise
but you do not feel my pain
i'm meat, you just surmise
no soul and little brains
was a fat dude...i...was.. a ...hefty thing
now i'm stuffed...and served with vegetables
i am turkey

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   18
 17
 17
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Hey, Alvin, great to see you back, man.. Notably clever adaption of the Helen Reddy signature song. Favorite line, "Turkey...on death row". Great seasonal eye-meat for AIR readers to gobble up, just a few days before the big one. And Happy Thanksgiving to you.
Belle - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
ummm..turkey! :) good one alvin. That song is going to be in my head all day now. I esp. liked the "I was turkey but no more; froxen at the grocery store." 5's
Belle - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
oop...frozen
Mark Scotti - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Welcome back, and Gobble, gobble, Alvin!!!! fivers
2Eagle - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
I missed you and your parodies. Am i Right wasn't the same without you. Your latest was a great seasonal effort.
carol brown - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
5 gobbles.
WarrenB - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Nice! And if Franklin would have his way, we'd be eating the national bird during the holidays.
John A. Barry - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Yes, Alvin, great to have you back. Hope you're gonna stick around.
Old Man Ribber - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Alvin - Delectible! ;D
Meriadoc - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Aaaaaalllllvvvvvviiiinnn! Great to see you writing again!
alvin - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
thanks AFW...felt good to contribute....thanks Belle....glad you enjoyed....thanks Mark....thanks 2eagle....awwwwww...that's sweet.....thanks Carol...thanks Warren...yep....thanks John...i'll post whenever my muse visits.....thanks OMR...thanks Merry....love to see some M & Ps too
LilCupCakes - November 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Sir Alvin, you remain our `Mighty Duke oRoads, Der Meister oSwerve und Curve, Sir !
alvin - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
thanks LCC :)
Andria - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
Very good... an improvement over the OS, seemingly written from a male chauvinist's point of view. I'll be posting parodies whenever my muse visits too, right now she's on a walkabout, left in September right after I posted "Eight-Track Tapes and Vinyl" (parody of Alan O'Day's "Undercover Angel"), and who knows when she'll be back. She took some Two-Buck Chuck and a box of Dunkin Munchkins too. 5s.
Claude Prez - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
Glad I didn't miss this. Great stuff Alvin (see what I did there?). Outstanding. My fave of the day.
Mark Scotti - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
Hey Alvin, Happy thanksgiving to you: http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/thebeatles2658.shtml
alvin - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
thanks andria...lol...i LOVE that dopey song.....thanks claude....heh heh heh....thanks mark...i'll check it out
Christie Marie M - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
Hi, friend! How are you? Great Thanksgiving parody you wrote! Been awhile since I've set foot on this site! I also wrote a few parodies the past few months on the site as well and wrote my first Big 7 titled "Such Luck-Superstitions Imperiled" last September. Anywho...I'll also work on some parodies soon and hope to see more of yours as well! Gobbling up some 5's for this one! Hope you enjoy a Happy Turkey Day! Can't hardly wait!
LadyNorCAL - November 23, 2010 - Report this comment
Have a wonderful & delicious ThanksGiving, Sir Alvin !
NorCALvotress - November 24, 2010 - Report this comment
Sir Alvin, I voted again for your tune ! ! . . . You were Turkey before . . . . now you're thawing on the floor . . . < * >

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