Shrimp’s On The Barbie

My Aussie friend came to visit me
I wanted to show what a bloke I could be
I rolled my kaiki shorts above the knee
Had “Men At Work” playing on CD
We started drinking; soon I heard a shout from the loo
“Crikey, why is the water blue, Mate,
And spinning counterclockwise too"

And the shrimp’s on the barbie and the stubbie’s cold
Kidman is hot and Mel Gibson is old
Crocodile Dundee drives a Subaru
And here’s a Four X for you, Mate
You know we’re gonna hoist a few

Some ships sailed South, it was told to me
Bound from England to start a new colony
Was it easy ? Oh! No…they survived barely
But 10 to life would be much worse you see
When the poor and weak were unjustly condemned
Well then, Ned Kelly fought for them, Mate
You know he did a lot for them

And the shrimp’s on the barbie and there’s lots of booze
Little kids ride on their pet kangaroos
And they hunt for dingos
In little gangs, and catch them with boomerangs, Mate
You know they’re good with boomerangs

My friend spoke of the Outback and he made a fuss
“Bout his friend Priscilla who drove a bus
So I asked, “should we walkabout for a while?"
He drank some grog, then spit on my tile
"What I'd really like, pal, is to groove to the Bee Gees
Listen, cobber, can I hear them please?"

And the shrimp’s on the barbie and old Shelia’s here
Flashin’ her fanny and drinking a beer
“Did you bring some frangers ?”
I hear her say, “cause this is your lucky day, Mates
It’s gonna be your lucky day”

The rag is now tired, asleep on the floor
My Aussie friend wants to drink some more
He says, "I love my country” with eyes aglow
His cheeks are streaked with tears and then before I know
He plays me’ “Waltzing Matilda” on his dirigidoo
And he keeps Reminiscing ‘till two, Mates
We just slide down-under ‘till two

Then with a faraway look he explains to me
About Gallipoli
A needless tragedy

And the shrimp’s on the barbie as the world goes on
Even though locals prefer the word “prawn”
Ask a Yank to find it
Won’t stand a chance, ‘cause most think that it’s close to France, Mates
You know they think it’s East of France…

IB