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Song Parodies -> "Zapped On The Table"

Original Song Title:

"Cat's In the Cradle"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Harry Chapin

Parody Song Title:

"Zapped On The Table"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

I won a prize just the other day
Trip to Disney World, all expenses they'll pay
So there's a plane to catch, few weeks away
I'll burn a lot on a sunny day
My skin's a chalky color - screw it - I'll tan it through
I'll say, "I'm gonna be like new, man,
You know I'm gonna be like new!"

I got zapped on the table with the U-V tubes
Should employ two-hundred S-P-F lube
E-lectronic faux-sun'll slow-roast men
Butt-weals get too redder then
Your glow-weals need some lube-slime then

My skin turned red just the other day
I went back to the mall, and turned on that ray
It'll bleach hair I know, from red-brown to gray
I bought a lot of tube-time and that's okay
As I got the rays, for a while on my skin,
Said "I'm gonna be like Sinbad,
You know I'm gonna be like him!"

I got zapped on the table with the U-V tubes
Corduroy ruby-red branding in grooves
E-lectronic faux-sun'll slow-roast men
Butt-weals get too redder then
You're glowing in your tube-time then

My son came from college just the other day
He said, "Yikes, a tan! What's up, dad, you gay?"
"Son, I'm straight as you, tan's a fit for my style."
He shook his head, and he said with a smile,
"That's a T.M.I., dad. If tomorrow your scar heals,
Use a grater when your scab-skin peels."

I got zapped on the table with the U-V tubes
Skin destroyed through tanning vanity-mood
E-lectronic faux-sun'll slow-roast men
Butt-weals get too redder then
New glow-weals after tube-time then

My brown skin's on fire
The fun's gone away
I called my doc just the other day

I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind."
He said, "I'd love to have your money for my time."

"I see your new tan's a hassle, and your skin's hotter too.
But the cure's ice-washing for you, man,
Yes the cure's ice-washing for you!"

And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me,
I'd bulked-up from U-V
The HULK
Was just like me!

I got zapped on the table with the U-V tubes
Skin destroyed due to my vanity, dude!
E-lectronic faux-sun'll slow-roast men
Butt-weals get too redder then,
And,
You know weals had a tube-time then!

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   12
 12
 12
 

User Comments

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The Pomfret (formerly Newfoghill) - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Gloriously revolting! And much applause for carrying the story strong through all those verses. Whatever you were doing the day you wrote this, do it again!
alvin rhodes - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
toasted to perfection...5s
Dee Range - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
"USE A GRATER WHEN YOUR SCAB-SKIN PEELS"gave me the funniest visual I've had in a while. This was great, man. 555
Rick C - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Yikes! Not many people voting tonight but, this is a classic! Glad I stopped by...555
Red Ant - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Another great. This has inspired me to finish parody called " Nuked By X-Rays ".
Jack Wilson - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Loved it! 555!
Charlie Decker - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
There's a tanning salon right near my school. It's always been a dream of mine to go get a wicked tan before 4th period English one Wednesday morning. 555
Johnny D - April 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, The Pomfret (formerly Newfoghill), Alvin, Dee, Rick, Red Ant, Jack, and Charlie.
Michael Pacholek - April 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Tan me hide? I'm not dead, Fred! Not yet, but be careful...
Johnny D - April 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, MP.
Chris Bodily TM - March 08, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC contest) I'm sorry, but this was from last year. It's not eligible. Sorry. 555 anyway, though I only know the chorus.
Johnny D - March 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks for the vote, Chris Bodily TM. This song, however, IS eligible for this current ABC-Z contest...please see Red Ant's note here:

http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,17249.0.html
Red Ant - March 15, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC-Z) See above, and outstanding job on not only hitting most of the internal rhymes but also varying them in the choruses (chori?).
Matthias - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Zorry for zhe late votez Johnny Z... So to make it up to you, I'm letting you win the Symbol round (Like you wouldn't anyways)... 5-5-5 Points Of Greatness To This Sweet Zong!!!
Agrimorfee - May 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC 05 Finals) Gave this a read for the first time. Not bad at all!
stuart mcarthur - June 05, 2006 - Report this comment
another classic beautifully-paced work JD

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