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Song Parodies -> "The Wreck of Candidate Willard"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"The Wreck of Candidate Willard"

Parody Written by:

Jeff in Richmond VA

The Lyrics

Romney is a job-killing, greedy, money-grubbing, flip-flopping liar who will say ANYTHING to get elected. I can't wait to see Obama shred him like confetti in the Presidential Debates this summer and fall!! Here is a futuristic look on the situation.......
The news just came out now from Iowa on down
Of the big jerk they call 'Willard Romney'
The 'Mitt', it is said, should just roll over dead
When debates with Obama bring comedy

He's such a big bore, spending millions of bucks more
than Gingrich, Santorum & Perry
He can't tell the truth and he's gonna' be chewed
When debates with Obama start early.

Old Mitt was the pride of the Republican side
Going back to the Statehouse in Boston
As the rich f**kers go, he's much richer than most
With a war chest for a long campaign season

Dictating his terms on a bankrupt steel firm
When he left them all jobless in Cleveland
And later that year when the mills closed down
Twas' the misery of Bain they'd be feelin'.....

(Guitar)

The windbags and liars made a back-pedaling sound
with the tales of Mitt's wheelin' & dealin'
And the Democrats knew, as Obama did too,
Would the election in November he be stealin'?

His Mormon faith was the topic of debate
When the ads from Obama came slashin'.
When October came, Mitt was feelin' pain
In the face of an anger-y West Wing.

(Guitar)

When fund-raising time came, David Koch called on Mitt, sayin'.
"Willard, we're gonna' support ya."
On September 10, when his campaign caves in, he'll say:
"Willard, it's been good t'know ya'"

His supporters wore thin as the polls were comin' in
He was proven to be a "job killer".
There won't be no doubt; if his taxes come out
(You'll) see the wreck of the candidate Willard.

(Guitar)

Does any one know where the voters all go
When debates turn the minutes to hours?
The pundits all say Mitt could win Election Day
If they block 1.6 million voters.

They might have split 'em up; or they might have downsized;
What matters is no one was hired.
And all that remains is the faces and the names
Of the workers Bain Capital fired.

(Guitar)

While poor people struggle; The Romneys live
In the luxury of 4 or 5 mansions.
Old Michigan learned, as Republicans turned
on the Unions of teachers & firemen.

And farther below down in Ohio
They'll pay for what Kasich has rendered,
And the Tea Party will go, as Republicans soon know
With the polls of November remembered.

(Guitar)

At the Democrat Hall in Detroit they'll cheer
for President Obama, the victor!!
The late-night show hosts will make twenty-nine jokes
For each flip-flop of candidate Willard.

The news has come out now from Iowa on down
Of the big jerk they call 'Willard Romney'.
The Governor, they said, should just roll over dead
When debates with Obama bring comedy.....






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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 1
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 1
 0
 
 5   7
 8
 8
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Nelson - January 11, 2012 - Report this comment
I agree. This year the Mitt's gonna hit the fan!!!
John Barry - January 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Your description of Mitt, though spot-on, is too kind. This guy is skin-crawling creepy.
Michael Pacholek - January 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Wow, somebody REALLY wanted a 5 from me. Well, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. This parody, like Mitt will be on November 6, is well done.
Rob Arndt - January 12, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm a REP and still gave you a 555 based on the parody! I DO NOT rate 1s due to ideology and appreciate it if you DEMs give me fair credit for my parodies. I even write against my own party when they fail and believe me, I don't anna vote for Romney- no way. That guy is nothing but a rich, spoiled Mormon outsider that is a moderate, left-leaner that now claims his is far-right (off his rocker). The man is worth a quarter-billion dollars and that $10,000 bet with Perry angered me at a time when the Middle Class is out of work and fighting for survival. His healthcare plan is too close to Obama's, so most REPs want to shun him for that as well. He's just trying to look the part and buy the election with loads of cash and his network (which is the same thing Obama did, only Mitt gets free publicity and the word out through the Mormon network as well). I hate to see another election decided through social media and cash spending. At leat the votes are proportional this time, so it may take a while to get a candiadate nominated. Romney has not wrapped up a win yet. Have to waith until Super Tuesday IMHO... If he gets the nomination as partyline voter this may be the first time I do not vote for the winner. I'm not voting for Obama either. i'd rather do a write-in... that's how sad this selection is.
Barry J. Mitchel - January 12, 2012 - Report this comment
A bit off on pacing at places, e.g., Romney/comedy rhymes, but considering overall thoroughness, a 455. My meager pro-Mitt offering today is mainly anti-Barack for stifling the economy and executive overreach. ABO!
CryHavoc - December 31, 2012 - Report this comment
A 5 for pacing and four for humor, but though I despise Romney as much as I do Obama, Kasich is a real Conservative. I am a Minarchist Libertarian and a Constitutionalist... The Constitution was abandoned by both Demon Rats and Republicant's when they allowed Amendment XVI to become law. If the GOP ever has the cojones to nomin ate a real conservative in 2016, I may cast my vote that way.

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