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Song Parodies -> "The Death of Miss Natalie Wood"

Original Song Title:

"Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"The Death of Miss Natalie Wood"

Parody Written by:

Dan Creeden

The Lyrics


It's a Hollywood tale that never grows stale
Even after thirty years have gone by
On a November night, into next day's sunlight
There are more questions of who, what or why
Now new evidence, how that evening went
About the death of Miss Natalie Wood
Are prompting the law, to re-open her fall
To get the facts straight and close it for good

Three men were on board, that boat docked near shore
The Captain, the Husband and Co-Star
That morning Natalie, was found by a dinghy
Mysteriously in the chilly waters
Her husband of grief, the star of " To Catch a Thief"
Robert Wagner said they were in a shore bar that night
With her co-star Christopher Walken, the three, they we're talking
And drinking way too much under the moon light

The witnesses that night, said there was a terrible fight
Between the husband and wife about her behavior
She showed too much attention, with overt flirtations
To Christopher Walken and not Robert Wagner
Captain Davern is sure, that night on the "Splendour"
After they got back on board from their excursion
The wine did still flow, by the sounds of arguments below
And there is more to it than the official police version

The evidence back then, suggested how she met her end
With alcohol being a contributing factor
But conflicting accounts, how it all did play out
Still raises more questions and yet no new answers
And there's a new book that's out, that brings accusations about
What may have happened on the boat in '81
Enough to re-open the case, investigate and retrace
To find an answer and the it's smoking gun

Her sister, Lana Wood, thinks it is all for the good
To find the truth and make this investigation complete
About a girl we always see, around this time every Thanksgiving
On every channel showing "Miracle on 34th Street"
A lover's quarrel, may have been Natalie's downfall
In the heat of the moment she fell off the side
If this is the sad fact, it's not what's coming attacked
But what happened after and three men who lied


Why did Wagner wait, to get the police to investigate?
And not let the Captain turn on the boat's searchlights
Was he afraid, of the mistake he just made?
Or just too drunk to see and think, in hindsight
Were they ashamed, how they all were to blame?
And agreed how they should cover their tracks
As it was only those three, left aboard on the Brainstorm seas
Were they afraid, if the police knew all the real facts?

So the story is again news, as police begin interviews
About that fateful Thanksgiving weekend that stood
Three boys and a girl, where one event changed their worlds
From the death of Miss Natalie Wood
But maybe it's best, that we just let her rest
And leave it all as should have, could have, would have
It won't bring her back, no matter any new facts
And that's something she'd agreed with, Natalie would have

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - November 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Well done-555!!! I personally think Wagner killed her. He was witnessed arguing with her fiercely on the starboard side of the boat, she goes missing... and then Wagner does not allow the Capt. to use searchlight nor radio for help. More than circumstantial I would say b/c he was jealous of her risign fame and thought she was sleeping with Walken. I like Wagner but he is said to have a foul temper. I think she was drunk and he pushed her over...
Old Man Ribber - November 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Dan - Not only has the Natalie Wood case been re-opened, but now so has our run of Edmund Fitzgerald parodies! Oh well, at least the latter will never be a felony. Well done. ;D

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