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Song Parodies -> "He’s Decked, Hit His Head, Stunned, It’s Harold!"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"He’s Decked, Hit His Head, Stunned, It’s Harold!"

Parody Written by:

blackjack21

The Lyrics

This is another step to the Big 7 for me, only two more to go. Since this is fairly lengthy I needed to pick a topic I wouldn’t have to research. Also thought you might be getting a little tired of the blackjack/Vegas stuff. So, we’re going with one of my other passions: golf! Have a good round. :-)
To first tee I’ve gone, to play marvelous golf round
On the big course they call Ditch of Gloomy
Tough course it brings dread, always gets in my head
Hop-ing today it will not consume me
With my old left shoulder sore, quickly I had to yell “Fore!”
Hit his head, stunned, it’s Harold! Prayed: help me!
Oh God what’d I do? I had beaned him it’s true
As he lay there, I trembled, no stirring

Oh Harold, I cried ‘cause I thought that he’d died
Wond’ring how I’d tell wife in Wisconsin
Then he sat straight up so, I thought, ‘Boy, that was close’
Not a clue had old Harold, I reasoned
Some brooding concerns, but then Harold, he con-firms
He does not fully re-call the beaning
So gamely I tried, coc-o-nut bell rang
‘Cause sometimes you know that they’ll be fallin’

I heave a deep sigh and I prattle, play round
And over the golf ball I’m flailing
On hole number two, I did hit one askew
To the ditch of new zip code, I'm reelin’
Didn’t look great and I’ll prob-a-bly make eight
Now my ball in the water is splashin’
Then the next hole came I managed to drain
A long putt for a birdie, pain lessened

When number four came, the old hook came on back
Strayin’ well in the deep rough and weeds, aah!
Made seven, three, then the rain hammered my skin
Key then carry for you good umbrell-a
But mine was mired in, my trunk, water drummin’ chin
And the golf trip so new was in peril
But later got bright, shanked ball right, went out of sight
Same old dreck that beaned head, stunned, hit Harold

Does anyone know where the love of golf goes?
When the tide turns and golf game goes sour
The hackers all say their bad shots always spray
And they put fifteen more strokes behind ‘em
My putt did hit cup but then skittered aside
Then went for broke, deep and hit farther
And all that remains is two twenty and change
So I tried, but I’m done, hit the water

Everyone’s goal: superior swing
In the booms of your big drive’s expansions
No Mulligan schemes, game’s less than it seems
The dry land fair-ways are for scor-in'
And don't fear to go, take on par, be low
Rake in what stakes beery can tender
If the irons float low, then the res-cue club will go
You'll prevail in the tourney of members

On the final hole, ball is deployed, well placed
But the slipp’ry club sailed for the clubhouse
The club still climbed and it spun ninety nine times
Sum-bitch! Lands on the fed up, pissed Harold!
The legend lives on 'bout old Harold, what he'd done
At the big lake on course Ditch of Gloomy
Hilarious they said, prefer calling it dread
Went in lake, my clubs, Harold got surly!
On November 10, 1975 the SS Edmund Fitzgerald sank in Lake Superior. All 29 crew members died. It was one of the worst shipping disasters on the Great Lakes. This parody in no way means any disrespect to those who lost their lives or to their families. R.I.P.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 1
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   11
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Timmy1000 - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Being a golfer, I enjoyed this one - one shot is bad and then one is good - only to entice you back out. Keep going on the big 7. I'm glad Harold had a better fate on this one. When I did my Edmund Fitzgerald, poor Harold suffered because he couldn't get any health care funds for his illness. Epic OS and golf story
AFW - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Well written...funny story...
Fiddlegirl - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
No wonder you're such an expert at "masher" shots! ;) This was truly sub-par... which, in this case, is a compliment!
TJC - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Diggin' your Tiger Words!
Fore? Nay! FIVE!
Christie Marie M - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
At first, I thought this was going to be about the game blackjack! Well, anyways, golf is the most peaceful sport that I know. The only golf I ever played is miniature golf. I echo all comments above! You scored a par 5 with this one!
John Barry - September 22, 2009 - Report this comment
You've made a boring pastime interesting. Congrats!
alvin - September 23, 2009 - Report this comment
lol...especially liked the zip code line
Kristof Robertson - September 23, 2009 - Report this comment
There's a wonderful nobility to your golfing ineptitude blackjack. Loved this (esp. Ditch of Gloomy)! 555
blackjack21 - September 23, 2009 - Report this comment

Timmy: Thanks, Harold always seems to have a tough time in those E.F. parodies, poor guy.

AFW: Thank you, thank you

Fiddlegirl: Thanks, my specialty is the "Mashie Niblick" shot. ;-)

TJC: Thanks, glad you dug the "Tiger Words" lol.

Christie: Thanks for the par!

John Barry: Thanks, it's not as boring if you take lots of beer.

alvin: Thanks, been there, huh?

Kristof: Thanks, golf IS a noble game, but not where I play. ;-)
Michael Pacholek - September 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Well, Mike came late, and your 5 had to wait, but I'm the one who makes "Wreck" riffs official. I'm no fan of putts but one would be a yutz if he did not five this here epistle!

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