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Song Parodies -> "I Will Survive... Valentine's Day"

Original Song Title:

"I Will Survive"

Original Performer:

Gloria Gaynor

Parody Song Title:

"I Will Survive... Valentine's Day"

Parody Written by:

Amy Poff

The Lyrics

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
When the clerk said, “out of ice cream,” prayed that she had lied
And with one more glance I took,
I found a pint she’d overlooked…
Cherry Garcia

And so you’re back from Cherub Land
I see you flitting overhead with all those arrows in your hand
Shooting love darts everywhere
Even at dogs, perhaps a fluke
And all the lovestruck, good and giddy, well they make me wanna puke
Cuz you fly by,
and turn your cheek
Ignoring bullseyes on these men I’ve painted in their sleep
Aren’t you the one who always misses with your aim
Every bachelor for miles?
Not that I’m one to cast blame
Oh no, not I, I will survive
As long as I have flics with Johnny Depp, and I have five
I’ve got all of them to watch
So my bedpost gets no notch, I will survive
I will survive, hey hey

It took all the strength I had not to make a wreck
Of your darts and stuff them down your little puffy neck
And I spent oh so many nights
Just plotting my revenge. Oh but why?
Now I just hold my spoon up high
And you see me, somebody who
Has a pint of Chunky Monkey, okay, maybe two
See I don’t wanna piss you off
This time next year you will return
And maybe fin’ly you’ll be grantin’ me the thing for which I yearn
I will survive, til then, you’ll see
And maybe, with some practice, you might snare a man for me
I’ve got a freezer full of treats
Til then, this creamy bliss
And if it takes a dart in each, I’ll be a target you can’t miss
Oh, oh

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Way to go, Amy! ;D
2Eagle - February 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Five pints of New York Super Fudge.
Fiddlegirl - February 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Love, Love, *Love*... the self-deprecating humor and dry wit of this one. TMGLTM, but LOL @ ending! :D 555 all the way.
Phil Nelson - February 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Good write!
Warren Baker - February 16, 2010 - Report this comment
This is such a great song for a parody, and I loved the way you handled it. I can see Gloria Gaynor dancing around with a carton of Ben & Jerry's in one hand and a spoon in another. Very funny!
adagio - February 16, 2010 - Report this comment
VERY funny!! :D

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