Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Desp'rate Writer (To Rude AmIRight Critics!)"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Desp'rate Writer (To Rude AmIRight Critics!)"

Parody Written by:

Witless Protection Program

The Lyrics

This is for all the nasty, obnoxious, overly critical people who bash other people's work, when they can barely even write themselves. Vote a steady stream of 5-5-5s to send these rude people a message!
Desp'rate Writer
You can't write parodies worth crap
And it's even worse that
You so love to hate
Oh, you're a mean one
I know you think you're a critic
But you're just 'pathitic',
So keep to yourself
You will draw the ire of all, girl
If you keep on what you're doing
You know a long, long silence would be your best bet
You should really heed my advice
Shut your trap while you are able
Or someone else may shut it for you yet
Desp'rate Writer
I know these words can't be pleasin'
But I've got good reason
For callin' you out
I ain't no censor,
You sure can have your opinion
But don't claim dominion
Or excess of clout.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

Voting Results

Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

This is sheer genius! - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Adagio - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Needed to be said. Good song, and difficult to work with.
The Great Karlando - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
The way I see it, when you publicly post something, you leave yourself open for all ranges of criticism, weather it be obnoxiously positive, or completely negative. Everyone has the right to voice their opinion about how good or bad a parody is. If people are afraid of having critical comments left, they don't have to include trhe comments section when they submit. As for your parody, this wasn't too bad, it just didn't flow real well in places. You seem to have a lot of stresses on words where there aren't stresses in the original. I would think that for someone who's bashing people not being able to write, that would have been one of your top priorities here. Hopefully you can differentiate between "bashing" and "criticism".
Your Worst Nightmare - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, so can't vote. I think all of my songs have been awarded with at least one cruel 1/1/1.
Kurt - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah! Stick it to the jerks that give you 1's and don't bother to leave a comment!
Claude Prez - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Well put, Karlando. You don't do anyone any favors by telling them their stuff is better than it is. Of course, if something sucks, the polite thing to do is keep your mouth shut but of course there are always going to be rude people who don't. Writing a song about them is a good way of dealing with it but I agree it could've been better. Good enough for fours though.
Royce Miller - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I read this parody and the thing that stuck out to me are your threatening words, "shut your trap while you are able or someone else may shut it for you yet"; I find that rude and I think "witless" is a good way to describe this parody.
S.T.G. - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
In my opinion I believe it was well-crafted but the threats could have been better. all 4s/
Are you talking about ME? - May 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Listen, "Witless", if you are who I think you are, you should just know that I am not about to apologize (OR SHUT UP) just because you don't like that I call them as I see them. If I think a parody is weak in some area (or stinks entirely), I'm going to say so. As someone already said, if you don't want comments, don't check the comments box! If you want someone to tell you how brilliant you are, just content yourself with showing them to your kids, and don't try to play with the grownups. Sheesh!
Witless - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you to everybody, except who voted a one and didn't even admit it or explain thereself. This is not against criticism only rudeness.
Kristof Robertson - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Witless, in some ways I agree with you...constructive criticism is far better than outright slating...but I also agree that you should be able to post negative comments without embarrassment. I also object to wanton brown-nosing; I have seen some distinctly average parodies swooned over, just cause the writer has got a rep. Btw, I hope you wont be offended by my 333s- it was OK, more angry than witty
Paul Robinson - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Witless, I thought this was pretty clever. Pace seemed good to me. I gave you "5-4-4" here. I don't know if it was intentional but you spelled "pathetic" wrong. If you put the "i" in place of the "e" on purpose for some point you really shouldn't have...I think most of the writer's here are bright enough to decide if a non-exact rhyme that has the right syllable emphasis works or not. If it wasn't intentional then you need to use your "spell-check" function in your word processing progam.
Witless - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Paul -- 'pathitic' in quotes was to signal me making joke of forcing the rhyme that doesn't really rhyme. My sister usually helps me with stuff like that cuz she's good at grammar and stuff, but she thinks parody stuff is silly. Kristof, criticism is good. You must be good at Kristofism :-). If something is bad, people shouldn't give it good rating, cuz that just makes fives mean nothing. I don't have kids to kiss my butt, so I don't know where whoever got that idea, but anyway, I don't need people to say stuff is good if its not. Be frank not rude. Maybe some don't know who I'm talking about cuz I dont wanna name a name and start bad stuff. This writing is just a sound off about the NASTY people who know who they are. I'm kinda annoyed at them, but not that much so this isn't as angry as people think. Just decided to write this to get it off my head.
Michael Pacholek - May 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Too short, not funny, a good idea atrociously executed. You're already gone.
2Eagle - May 29, 2004 - Report this comment
You're right. Strong points should be stressed. There is a difference between hurling insults and offering constructive criticism.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1139