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Song Parodies -> "Zen Master D"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Zen Master D"

Parody Written by:

Jack Rudd

The Lyrics

A long, long time ago
I can still remember
How our Divvie used to make me mad
And I knew that if I had my way
You'd go and leave the site today
So as not to spoil all the fun we've had
But something in this makes me wary
Your messages are really scary
You may be really leaving
But I'm not yet believing
I know there's a good chance you might
Come back to start another fight
But just for now, it's all all right
The day you left the site

So flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."

Did you write a load of flames
And do you have lots of time for games
Played at someone else's expense
And did you know you're just a troll
On target less than Andy Cole
Who never even had a lick of sense
Well, I knew that you were really vile
When you called me a paedophile
And other such old crap
Why don't you shut your trap?
You're just a lonely drugged-up cyberpunk
With some worthless comments all just filled with junk
Let's just say all your threads were sunk
The day you left the site

I started saying: flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."

Now for three years you've been calling names
And sending lots of other flames
But that's not how it used to be
When the regulars discussed the rails
In shirts they got from Barry Hayles
And a voice that came from you and me...
And as the thread was getting black
You jumped in with a tasteless crack
Came off as really thick
As sensitive as a brick
So as you sod off to Belize
We've all been praying on our knees
"Don't let that wanker come back, please"
The day you left the site

And we were saying: flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."

Walker, talker, every tale a porker
Our Div became a cyberstalker
Just totally obsessed with tree
So beria got you locked out
But you came back wearing a pout
And going by the name of "ZMD"
Now the site became distinctly grim
Thanks to your total assault on him
You're just a bloody fool
Why must you be so cruel?
Now you may have left the battlefield
But we're still keeping our eyes peeled
Do you recall what was revealed
The day you left the site?

We started saying: flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."

In there, we were all in one place
The nicest site in cyberspace
With no time for your poisoned pen
So come on, Div be nimble, Div be quick
Stop being such a total prick
'cause Wolverine is still your only friend
And as you expletived up the page
My hands were clenched in fists of rage
No agency of doom
Could break your bloody ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
And as your flames climbed high into the night
We all knew that they still lacked bite
And I saw tree dancing with delight,
The day you left the site

And he was singing: flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."

I met a big fan of the blues
And I asked him "what's the happy news"
And he just pointed to this thread
So I began to read the posts
And when I saw them, I was most
Astounded by the things that you had said
I can't believe you've really gone
Will this state of things last for long?
If it isn't a fake
It won't be hard to take
'cause as you left by your own choice
We listened to the people's voice
And one by one, they all rejoiced
The day you left the site

And they were signing: flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free..."
Flee, flee, Mr "Zen Master" D
You've been spouting lots of bile but it bounces off me
And I'll celebrate by drinking mugloads of tea
Saying "this will be the day that we're free,
This will be the day that we're free."

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Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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