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Song Parodies -> "Transylvanian Guy"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Transylvanian Guy"

Parody Written by:

Klif Fuller

The Lyrics

Vlad the Impaler held off Turkish invaders to prevent Transylvania from become a Muslim country. Wallachian , 'Wallachia' was the province he ruled. 'Vovoide' is Transylvanian title, meaning 'warlord' or 'prince'. 'Boyars' are barons. 'Poienari' is the location of Vlad's fortress. All the 'attrocities' mentioned here really happened.
Long, long time ago,
I can still remember how the Turks used to make me mad
But I knew if I impaled them all
Then my country wouldn't fall
And the world would not forget the name of Vlad

So the Turkish came and I was waiting
Praising God and Muslim hating
They were sure that quite soon,
We'd bow to the crescent moon,
I still remember how they screamed,
As with a sharp stake they were reamed,
Wallachian* throne, it was redeemed.
The day the Muslims died

I was singin'..
My my Transylvanian guy,
Got my army and I'm barmy
Which you cannot deny
And those sharpened stakes I got them all standing by,
Singin' this could be the day that you die
This could be the day that you die


Then I planned a lavish feast
And invited beggars from the West and East
To come along to eat their fill,
And as they tucked in I made things hot,
And barbecued the whole damn lot,
And you know that it gave me such a thrill


Now my subjects knew I was the boss,
I was the dude you did not cross,
I ruled with an iron fist
Man, you don't wanna get me pissed,

I was a psychopathic, young Vovoide*,
And you don't wanna get me annoyed,
Impaling folk I so enjoyed
And daily people died

I was singin'..
My my Transylvanian guy,
Got my army and I'm barmy
Which you cannot deny
And those sharpened stakes I got them all standing by,
Singin' this could be the day that you die
This could be the day that you die

Then I made the Boyars* work
And I told them with an evil smirk,
My fortress you will now re-build,
And I worked the bastards "til they dropped
At Poienari* on that mountain top,
If they refused I simply had them killed

And diplomats and foreign toffs
Who would not take their turbans off
Well they made me see red,
So I nailed them to their heads,
I had law and order in my land,
With a sharpened stake always close to hand
I ruled supreme and life was grand
And daily people died

And I was singin'..
My my Transylvanian guy,
Got my army and I'm barmy
Which you cannot deny
And those sharpened stakes I got them all standing by,
Singin' this could be the day that you die
This could be the day that you die
(repeat)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 8

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