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Song Parodies -> "Amusement Park Rides"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Amusement Park Rides"

Parody Written by:

Mark Scotti

The Lyrics

My final version (has missing verse at end) "Welcome to the Hotel Calif....Six Flags???"

Was not too long ago,
Young girl got dismembered on
A Six Flags wild Superman ride
On every ride we take a chance
That car we're on just might detach
And maybe, send us flying for a mile

Their safety standards make me shiver
Another casket got delivered
Bypassed on that last check
They never care to inspect
They will give you breaks on their fries
While they reassure you with their lies
Throw new paint on now it can hide
Cracks on that whirling ride

So...

(Chorus)
Why die on Amusement Park Rides
You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives
In all that noise we're screamin' save me and why
Wonderin' "Is this a new ride that can fly?,

Is this a new ride that can fly?"

Did you leave the park some blood
I don't have faith in carny crud
Since their actions are so slow

Now our bodies are not meant to roll
Should take your fear and not your soul
And not to bang me a real chance death blow
Well that ride I went in on a whim
'Cause it looked like good fun when it spins
They said take off your shoes
I should have passed on that weird news

I was spinning wild and so unaware
That in the end I would look like Linda Blair
Need exorcism for that chair
On that wild, zipper ride,

I started screaming..

(Chorus)
Don't die on Amusement Park Rides
You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives
In all that noise we're screamin' save me and why
Wonderin' "Are we in a part of Saw 5?

Are we in a part of Saw 5?"

Now face the fear just exposed a bone
You got thrown splat on a nearby stone
When the belt broke and you sailed free
When the State Fair rang you just made the scene
You just hoped for fun not lose a spleen
Little voice should have said you should flee
Oh and while the ride was whizzing round
Some bolts flew off and you went down
Park's lawyers had well earned
A case where you got burned

And while heavens had just filled with sparks
They claimed you went too near the arc
Got third degrees and left the park
On that, Inferno ride,

You were screaming...

(Chorus)
Why die on Amusement Park Rides
You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives
In all that noise we're screamin' save me and why
Wonderin' "The thrill is if we all survive,

The thrill is if we all survive"

Summer swelter made you seek some shelter
Log flume had turned into Helter Skelter
Very high drop and fallin' fast
No belts needed but alas
The seat broke off and stuck in your ass
Got a free return pass with your body cast

Now the dolphin show would start real soon
As the music blasts an aqua tune
At fish you want to glance, and it gave them that one chance
'Cause the sea lions were short a meal
Your waving hand just closed the deal
On the day where you fed the seals
Your hand, has waved goodbye,

And you were screaming..

(Chorus)
Why die on Amusement Park Rides
You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives
In all that noise we're screamin' save me and why
Wonderin' "Why can I count only to five?

Why can I count only to five?"

Too many people jammed in place
Your coaster ride is lost in space
Jumped off that track you face your end

Just went on, it's a gamble,
Wheels will click,
Wheels smashed hard on a loosened brick
'Cause tires are what they never get checked

As some people fell from the cage
You watch them hit the high dive stage
Their bodies smashed to gel
You make your last farewell
And as the coaster teetered from your height
You looked down and for extra fright
You saw carnies betting on your plight
No way, the cars collide

You were screaming..

(Chorus)
Why die on Amusement Park Rides
You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives
In all that noise we're screamin' save me and why
Wonderin' "Why my ride had made a swan dive?

Why my ride had made a swan dive?"

You saw a ride that looked real new
And the guy said it was hardly used
It was too calm you turned away

They sell insurance in the store
Never have seen them do that before
And the fine line read you're riding your last day

Now every ride seems like a dream
More people died what does it all mean
Your hand has world end tokens
Your fate now has been spoken

So those three men you'd admired most will guide you as you are now a ghost
You're on a peace train and it floats
The way, you love to, ride

And you're now singing...

(Chorus )
I fly on Amusement Park Rides
You're soul's heavy as a chevy; final peace you rely
And that's your choice no grievin' and you know why
Reflectin' "How my life has been a wild ride

How my life has been a wild ride"....

I fly on Amusement Park Rides
My soul's ready not so heavy; I'm at peace so goodbye
And now my train is sailing high in the sky

Leavin' my life that has been a wild ride...

Copyright 2009

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   20
 20
 20
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - July 01, 2009 - Report this comment
excellent...my fave of the day....especially liked the linda blair reference
AFW - July 01, 2009 - Report this comment
Caps off a goody..
Mark Scotti - July 01, 2009 - Report this comment
Thrilling thanks to you, Alvin & AFW!!
Tommy Turtle - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Nailed it.
Thinnest Book Of World Records - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
TT's shortest comment ever!
Mark Scotti - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Tom(for all the advice!!)
Cody Slusher - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
I enjoyed that. Do a parody of "Let It Rock".
Mark Scotti - July 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Cody. GREAT IDEA!!!
Christie Marie M - July 03, 2009 - Report this comment
In spite of my fear of roller coasters and amusement park rides, I end up going anyways. Thrilling parody, though. 5's.
Mark Scotti - July 03, 2009 - Report this comment
Extra tickets and thanks to you, Christie!!
Andy Primus - July 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Wow - great job done on this
Mark Scotti - July 07, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Andy!!!
blackjack21 - July 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Very amusing stuff. You must be at least 5.55 feet tall to ride this parody.
Mark Scotti - July 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Pass for "free ride" and thanks to you, blackjack!!!
Abbott Skelding - August 10, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM: Excellent job...now i'm nervous cause i'm going to an amusment park tomorrow...guess what song will be on my mind? lol 555 all the way!
DJ Blaze - August 10, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM: I remember reading the older version of this parody, and this one's even better! I stand by my 555s from the original parody.
Mark Scotti - August 10, 2009 - Report this comment
Free ride of thanks to you, Abbott & DJ!!
Medemia - August 12, 2009 - Report this comment
Pacing is fantastic. Subject is morbid. It had great moments like Blair. Overall, good work.us I need to go back to Magic Mountain.
Mark Scotti - August 12, 2009 - Report this comment
Thrilling thanks to you Medemia!
Guy - August 15, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM-Aug-09)

Mark - Is it just coincidence that this OS is about three vocalists who lost their lives flying in a plane near Storm Lake, Iowa? Kinda creepy the thought - but the parody is excellent. I noted the refs to the dolphin shows etc. Made me think of Sea World. I live so close to Sea World that I can see it from my front yard. My youngest son worked on the steel eel at Sea World two years ago as a summer job. He complained constantly at the never ending inspections he had to do climbing up the tracks to inspect the ride. So I know that Sea World really keeps a tight grip on the safety of their rides. IMO I'm safer on an amusement park ride than I am in my car on the freeways around town. I'm just glad that I get to control the car I'm driving.
Mark Scotti - August 15, 2009 - Report this comment
Extra ride of thanks to you, Guy!!!
Peter Andersson - August 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Another grim take on one of the songs done to death, that's kinda appropriate somehow...
Mark Scotti - August 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Afterlife peace & thanks to you, Peter!
Matthias - August 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Are any of these stories true? I remember hearing something about "Superman" at Six Flags but I may just have an over active imagination... This was a great idea for this long song and I really enjoyed your work here Mr. Steven King.
Mark Scotti - August 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Matthias. Actually, the Superman story was semi-true(the girl lost her legs), but it led to the inspiration...
Leo Keough - August 29, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Excellent work on one of the Biggies!!!...Liked the references to the horror film genre...555!!!
Mark Scotti - August 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Extra ride of thanks to you, Leo!!
bobpiecheese - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) It's one thing to write a parody of American Pie. It's another thing entirely to make death funny. It's a third thing to work in the word 'spleen'. And so for those three things that you pulled off with great style, I give you 555.
Mark Scotti - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, bobpie!
Below Average Dave - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I see the positive comments have come out in bunches on this one. . .you had some killer lines in here, and the opening reference to the Superman Ride was a good inclusion as was Saw V, This song has some trippy rhymes in there, and when you chance them you have to be careful, for example stanza one is an "AABCCB" the first two lines have an end rhyme, the fourth and fifth lines do as well, the third and sixth one also rhyme, which you missed with "ride & mile" . . .I caught others, but I won't hamper it, you are still new to contests, and I'm not trying to come off as picky, just giving advice--be careful when taking on epic songs: especially if you ever do a rap song--sometimes there are rhymes that are tricky and easy to overlook. . .good job overall though
Mark Scotti - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Dave(for the advice as well!!)
Phil Alexander - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Well-written, but I'm afraid that it didn't grab me for the length of this one (it *is* very hard one to parody all the way through without running out of inspiration & rhymes that are a little different)

PS I wonder if Dave's "killer lines" pun was intentional...
Mark Scotti - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Phil! I was shooting for a Twilight Zone, Hotel California type of tale. It's not for everyone, I agree, but I do think that i put a new inspired twist on a parody that's been beaten to death(no pun intended....)
Below Average Dave - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
I caught it before posting it. . .but then decided the pun fit well :)
Mark Scotti - September 01, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Dave!
Agrimorfee - March 02, 2010 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Who'da thunk this parody topic would turn out so successful? (Worse still after the recent death by a killer whale at Sea World) Kinda sick, but damn, the efforts on the rhymes and the changing of the chorus were stellar. BAD and I would nitpick but the sum outshines the parts.
Mark Scotti - March 02, 2010 - Report this comment
THANKS, AGRI!!!!!
Jeff Reuben - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Very well done, I loved the line "You're too heavy; this may levy us the cost of our lives"
Mark Scotti - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
'Extra Ride" of thanks to you, Jeff!
Arwen - March 10, 2010 - Report this comment
SOTY...are you trying to make me paranoid right before I go to Disneyland next week, Mark? ; ) Nice work on a beast of a song...
Mark Scotti - March 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks, Arwen! If there's any park you can put complete trust in, it is DISNEY!!!
Silver Power - March 14, 2010 - Report this comment
[SOTY] I loved this parody.. You mentioned everything to make someone not want to ever look at a rollercoaster again. Kudos.
Mark Scotti - March 14, 2010 - Report this comment
"thrilling" thanks to you, SP!!!
Invisible Boy - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Great work here Mark.
I decided long ago never to trust my life to ride operators that still haven't learned to brush or floss...
Mark Scotti - April 01, 2010 - Report this comment
"Clean teeth' of thanks to you, IB!!!
EmiLoca - April 08, 2010 - Report this comment
Hilarious concept for a difficult song to parody,. Thanks for keeping it fresh with chorus changes and amusing couplets.
Mark Scotti - April 09, 2010 - Report this comment
"Free Ride Pass" of thanks to you, Emi!!
Below Average Dave - April 10, 2010 - Report this comment
See my above comment, you are growing since this one mark. . .

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