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Song Parodies -> "Can't Beat Hugo At Ping-Pong"

Original Song Title:

"Only You Know And I Know"

Original Performer:

Dave Mason

Parody Song Title:

"Can't Beat Hugo At Ping-Pong"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

A little background here first - The company I work for moved a few months ago to a larger facility. With some of the extra space in our warehouse we now have a half-court basketball court, a pool table, and a ping-pong table. I happen to be pretty damned good at I was worried I wouldn't have any real competition, which would be boring. I needn't have worried - we have a young man here named Hugo who happens to be an exceptional player. Right now he generally beats me by about a 2 games to 1 margin...and I have to play damn well to win that many - and I HAVE played really well, too. We have a lot of points where I return multiple slams successfully...but they just keep coming. He's just younger and...well...(gulp) better...for right now, anyway. But my game is improving...yeah, and so is his. But it's great fun to have some one to play with that pushes you to pick up your game. We have a great time. We're both tough competitors who don't like to lose, but we're both also good sports about it. I get mad at myself for he does on his end...but we don't bitch about the other guy...compliments for good shots and good games...the way good competitor's should act. Anyway, here's the story...
[instrumental intro]

Can't beat Hugo at Ping-Pong
I can't figure out what is wrong
I don't like losing; believe it
But I've absorbed many beatings

'Cause Hugo
Plays a mean game, I say
And it shows
Because he's been creaming me each game
I used to beat everyone with whom I played
But that's not true no more, 'cause he just blows me away

[instrumental break]

Getting beaten don't please me
I don't like taking a beating
But each time I receive it
Aw, I'm depressed, yes, indeedy
'Cause I know
That I have been outplayed
'Cause Hugo
Does things that make my game decay
He knows now just how he wants to play each game
So what I try to do don't matter, puts me away

[instrumental break]

So I get creamed now and that's true
Getting my ass kicked is really screwed
He hits these hot slams right at you
You can't return them to him, dude

That Hugo
He sure knows how to play
Makes me moan
'cause I can't beat that dude, no way
It blows that this dude can beat me any day
Yeah man, it's screwed, it makes me holler "Oy vey!"

[instrumental break]

Can't beat Hugo at ping-pong
Man, I wish that I was wrong
We play hard, yeah, we play long
Uh-huh, he sure beats me, his game's strong
{Hits his slams like he's King-Kong}

[instrumentals out to end fade]

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Adagio - November 14, 2006 - Report this comment
I followed your music and it 'scans' nicely. I enjoyed it, Paul.
Paul Robinson - November 14, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks, Pat ~ ~ ~
alvin rhodes - November 14, 2006 - Report this comment
my favorite of the day
Paul Robinson - November 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, mine too, alvin (lol))...Thanks! ~ ~ ~
Stuart McArthur - November 14, 2006 - Report this comment
I want to hear Hugo's side of the story - funny idea, Paul - 555
Paul Robinson - November 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, Stuart - he laughed his ass off when I played it for him...just before our last match a week ago. I told him we needed some "warm-up" music and he just looked at me funny. He really enjoyed it, then went out and, as has become usual lately, beat me 6 games to 3. I ALMOST got him...had cut it to 4-3 at one point, but he really pounded me the next game (he doesn't like to lose 3 games in a was at "2", and then prevailed in the last game at 22-20 ("overtime")..I COULDA won that...but that's what often happens when someone is just a bit better. Thanks...PS, we'll probably be playing after work today...perhaps I'll come back and give a report on the results (unless I get totally
Meriadoc - November 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Hou Go, Paul! ;-)
Paul Robinson - November 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Mer, Thanks! Paul vs. Hugo Ping-Pong Results Update...This evening's match: Hugo 8 Paul 3. For the most part I stunk...I had many good shots and returns but negated them with really mediocre or worse plays - sometimes strung together in bunches. I lost the first 4 games and was terrible, won the next 3, then lost the last 4 games, 3 of them in "Overtime" (for those unacquainted, you win at "21" points in ping-pong, but must win be at least 2 or play on with serve alternating after 2 points played instead of 5. Honestly, neither of us were particularly sharp tonight, but we fought it out...And still, it was fun, although I'd sure much rather have played well...there's always next time...Now I'm dead tired sitting here still trying to finish some work I put off earlier...better come up with some energy soon or I'll be greeting folks here in the morning in this same sweaty t-shirt and shorts...

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