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Song Parodies -> "Scares Don's Mom"

Original Song Title:

"Carry On"

Original Performer:

Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Parody Song Title:

"Scares Don's Mom"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Oh, poor Don! His aging Jewish Mother has been on his 43-year old, still-single behind for years to find a "Nice Jewish Girl you can settle down with". You may recall that recently his Mother cornered one such "Nice Jewish Girl" at a neighbor's house and subjected the poor woman to a full-court press that Johnny Wooden would have been proud of in an effort to lasso said lass (see "Marry Don, My Eldest Son", Once that task was met she figured it would be child's play for her to finally nag reluctant Don into the holy bonds of matrimony. This morning, however, the entire plan ran into a little snag; the little snag's name is "Harvey" and he has come "a-callin" on Don; a turn of events that will soon drive Dear Mom into an apoplectic state. Oh, by the way, while Harvey is certainly very much interested in Don, it just so happens that Don is not all that especially interested in Harvey. Ah, if only Don could only find a way to interject that thought somehow...but by now he has long since learned that it would be easier to make the world stop turning.
("Carry On" music)

Good morning, I'm Harvey. I'm here now
To visit Don
By the way, I am gay
And so is your eldest son
"Gay? Oy Vey! I'd always prayed
Please, not my son"

Oh my, I'm fearing that he might
be coming out
My Son, he's one, that "word"
Is not polite
You should think twice, that's my advice
Please, reconsider son

That lifestyle's unstable; your gay man
Might soon be gone
Now quit this, admit this;
He'll leave you
It won't be long
This thing you choose, someday I think you'll rue
Careful, son

Careful, son
It's a dumb thing
Such a dumb thing, after all

(Instrumental break)

(Changes to "Questions" music here)

Your life is going to be very tough
It could be filled with sorrow
This won't bring you happiness
Your life will feel hallow
I'm so stressed now that I want to scream
How could you do this to me?
Please son, won't you hear my plea?

Now I'm going to really moan
Making sad sounds
How could you be so dumb?
I'm so distressed I may come unwound
I'm depressed; wish that this was a dream
Why can't you see what I mean?
Son, please listen to my plea

(Instrumentals to end)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

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Rick D - March 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul, this was amusing to to us for another reason. We have an original about this exact thing called "My Good Son", which Mari sings in her best Jewish accent. Since you've done this, maybe we'll post it on Soundclick.
Paul Robinson - March 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick - It kuud be fun, maybe...
Johnny D - March 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul! This is great! "Carry On" is a sentimental favorite from my CSN/Grateful Dead/Jefferson Airplane/Steely Dan/Santana/Derek And The Dominos/etc etc etc stoner days. Ahhhh..... memmmmm'ries......uhh...what? 555
Paul Robinson - March 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - Thanks.

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