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Song Parodies -> "Crosby Cooks: Dave's Bad Food"

Original Song Title:

"Déjà vu Album"

Original Performer:

Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Parody Song Title:

"Crosby Cooks: Dave's Bad Food"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Hi, this is Paul. Welcome to my "Crosby Cooks: Dave's Bad Food" Parody Project. I've taken all ten Original Songs on the Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young album "Déjà vu" from 1970 plus one additional "Bonus Track" from a later album and written a parody piece with a theme premise that involves David Crosby doing the cooking for the group. I've changed the Track Order in order to develop a story-line that will run through the album and maintain story continuity. I am supplying a plot narrative before many of the pieces to place it in the overarching context and have also added a "Bonus Track" at the end that ties up the plot-line...I hope you enjoy my Project Parody.
Our story starts out innocently enough...well, sorta...David Crosby catalogue orders a book that he THINKS is about "Intensifying and Expanding Your Cocaine Experience". However, he misread the Catalogue description and title and ended up receiving "Intensifying and Expanding Your COOKING Experience". Somewhat bummed, he puts the book down but later on that evening starts to idly thumb through and read some of the text and accompanying menu suggestions. As he skims on he starts to become more and more interested and engaged and finally ends up voraciously reading almost half the whole book before eventually conking out for the night. He awakes the next morning and his very first thought and desire is to make special meals for the entire group. This leads up into our first parody track, as he pops his proposal to the rest of the group...which prompts their initial response...


1.
Let's Eat Out
originally
"Carry On"


After the rest of the group hears David's plan to begin cooking all the group's meals they reflect on their somewhat skeptical and reluctant view and end up going out for breakfast...So Crosby tosses a few Pop Tarts in the toaster oven and munches on those...and begins devising a Special Treat for the guys for the afternoon...A PIE...he decides...A SPECIAL PIE...which will take us into Track #2, "4+20 Blackbirds Baked In This Here Pie"...But first, we must wait for the rest of the group to return many hours later, having not only dined, but managed somehow to get some pretty intense and satisfying "buzzes" going between them...Stills sees a Pie cooling on the counter...and next to the pie he spies an open Cookbook, turned to a Section that is titled, "4+20 Special Pie Recipes", with a large picture on the opposite page showing this scrumptious looking Pie with this caption underneath: "Even the best of boys (and girls) would have trouble resisting the urge to stick a big thumb into this Special Treat". Happens that it is Stephen's 24th birthday in a couple days, so he figures it's probably for him anyway...so he sticks he right thumb into the pie, ready to scoop out a tasty thumb-sized snack and down it...and THEN...


2.
4+20 Blackbirds Baked in This Here Pie
originally
"4+20"


So...Stephen got his thumb bit in that Pie...and then the group laments the Food situation in...


3.
Meals 'Round Here Are Hell
originally
"Teach Your Children"


And...


4
Tasteless
originally
"Helpless"


So Dave decides to try something NEW...FONDUE!


5
Dave's Fondue
originally
"Déjà vu"


...which doesn't go over well at all...and causes the boys to again lament in...


6
Crosby's Gruel
originally
"Country Girl Medley"


Well, Dave's finally getting more than a little annoyed by the boys...he decides to make a special Steak Dinner Meal for them all...but he is very much on edge and ready to pounce at the slightest suggestion of anything real or imagined being wrong with the fare...


7
Dave's Anger Flares
originally
"Almost Cut My Hair"


So...after that tense, awkward, discomforting, and well, lousy meal, Stills, Nash & Young decide they need to confront Crosby...so they call a "Group Meeting", which quickly turns into a...


8
Group Spat
originally
"Woodstock"


...which turns into a wild free-for-all melee with Stills trying to strangle Crosby in the final verse and Neil Young pulling off into his own world where other people, especially band members, are just more sounds & images for him to play notes off of...He remains with the group, but he has pretty much decided it's time to separate...but he still joins in with Nash & Stills to share in their common complaint about Dave's cooking in....



9
David Crosby Cannot Cook
originally
"Everybody I Love You"


....which fairly well summarizes their feelings and thoughts on Crosby's Cooking...David, on the other hand, is now quite fed up with all the grousing, bitching, whining, moaning and complaining...and says so...and more in...


10.

Crosby Cooks at Our House

originally
"Our House"


...where he goes the other band members one better...and quits the group altogether, a development the others did not envision or desire, so...


11

Sucking up to Dave

originally
"Wasted on the Way"


...it becomes necessary to persuade Dave to stay in the group...but must be done "just so" in order to get him to relinquish the cooking chores but still save face about it...and it is so done...and so Peace & Contentment settle over our Merry Band of Three (Crosby, Stills & Nash)...while Neil bails to go off on his own...


~ ~ ~ the end ~ ~ ~
Thank you for coming over and reading my "Crosby Cooks: Dave's Bad Food" Parody Project. I hope you enjoyed reading and imagining the separate and overall stories as much as I enjoyed imagining and writing them.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

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alvin rhodes - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
a banquet of delights...5s
Paul Robinson - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, alvin...glad you enjoyed my little "Buffoon Buffet" ~ ~ ~
Paul Robinson - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Just noticed that for some reason my link to Song #2 ("4+20 Blackbirds Baked in This Here Pie") does not work. It is "" Hope I copied it right to this box now...anyway, it's also in my Author's Page listing about the 2nd or 3rd from the top...
Adagio - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Really good album, Paul. I was going to say that a couple of the links were broken, but as for me, I'm sure that I read them before.
2nz - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Way to go Paul. I've been under the weather and busy to boot lately but I'm glad I caught this. Excellent organizational effort and good job arranging and carrying through your idea. I don't have access to any of the music you used here (and sad to say I'm not familiar with it already) but I will be back when I find a good music source. Until then, great work on finishing what you started (a difficult accomplishment with one parody, let alone 11 themed ones).

Oh, tech notes: songs '2' and '3' on this page have unworking links. When the page was created, it seems the code stuck an extra line and a line-break in those two links. I don't know if there's any easy way to change the links so that they work. Run it by Chucky.

In both cases the link is preceded by 'http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/
' and 'www.' is missing from the actual link. If this isn't English to you, no worries. Just forward the preceding explanation to Chucky in some form
Paul Robinson - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Pat, Thanks! 2nz - Thanks! I have found I like to put this type of challenge out in from of me...it helps keep me fresh and motivated to write more. It also keeps me on the lookout for other possible projects that might be interesting to do. It's funny, I had the idea for this Project theme after writing the "4+20" parody back in early July, I think...since I was house-sitting I didn't move on it at that time...but I had a few thoughts about some of the songs and how they could be used...then I started writing a 2nd piece while up North on vacation...and started to come up with other general stories for some of the others...after posting 4 or 5 I realized I could work the pieces in a way to give the whole story a continuity...that changed how what and how I wrote some of the final pieces since it narrowed the focus further. Thanks for the info about the non-functioning links - I THINK I understand what you are saying about the link presentation...I thought I must have done something wrong in assembling the links, but I was VERY deliberate and took great care in creating them since it was the first time I had ever tried to do it ~ ~ ~
Larry Hensley - September 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Good project, funny idea.
Paul Robinson - September 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry ~ ~ ~

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