Song Parodies -> J*zzman

Original Song Title:	"Jazzman"
Original Performer:	Carole King

Parody Song Title:	"J*zzman"
Parody Written by:	Johnny D

Gift me, won't you gift me
A cup of bold new genes
Donate nice
Spray it clean
J*zzman

When the J*zzman's testiclyin'
He makes his manhood breathe
He can fling goo into plastic vials
And give you what you need

It's a glass-full kind of feelin'
A touch of Astroglide
A strong and pure donation
From a guy that's gratified

J*zzman
Take my blues away
Make my genes com-bine with yours
Through DNA you spray

J*zzman
Ohhh J*zzman

When the J*zzman's 'rectifyin'
And his hand is grindin' slow
With the Astroglide he's warming up the hardness of his pole

He can fill a tube with man-ness, as he thrills his horn with cheer
He fills vials like an on-call angel, when ovulation's near

J*zzman
Take my blues away
Make my genes com-bine with yours
Through DNA you spray

Oh gift me, won't you gift me
With ev'ry sperm around
Spray it sweetly
Donate now
Ohhh J*zzman!

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User Comments Follow...

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John Barry - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

15 CCs for this line alone: "When the J*zzman's testiclyin." Love your neolojizzms.

Kristof Robertson - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Looks like you've made a new friend, Johnny! Hey, I liked it! 555

Arwen - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

It got through!! 5s, Mr. D...=)

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Thank you, Kristof and Arwen! :-)

Some other guy - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Some guy: If you can hand the meat, jets out of the jism. I mean, if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

Adagio - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

What's j*zzman?

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

" J*zzman " = " Jizzman "

Mistress Leola - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Yo, 'some guy', I'm sure you're so "disgusted" that you plan to return here to view the responses to your silly little comment, so here you are:
Spank me. Hard.

Arwen - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

LOL--and then OL again, Leola...

alvin rhodes - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

here's 5s comin' at ya

EmiLoca - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

No comment. [ta-da! irony!] 5's.

Meriadoc - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Jist perfect!

Billy Florio - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

I am very offended by this crap ;-).....nice work Johnny

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Mistress Leola: That's tellin' 'em! Crack that whip, Mistress! Thanks!

Arwen: Thanks again.

alvin: And here's thanks comin' at you!

Merry: Thanks! Sounds like you got the jist of it!

Billy Florio: Hey, you're the dude who says that I look like Ozzie! I'm offended by THAT crap, mainly because I really DO resemble that remark! J/K, dude...thanks! ;-D

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

EmiLoca: Ooops, sorry I omitted a thank-you for you in that previous comment-block ..... guess I had "no comment" at the time! Thank you, Ultra-Literate-Emi !

Adagio - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

moi ? I didn't say much, but said something.

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Ooops, sorry, Adagio, for some reason when I was cranking-out the thank-you's I thought I had already thanked-you up above.....Now I see that I did not, so, thanks very much, Pat! ;-)

Ashkicksass - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

This horn fills me with cheer! And to some guy: To quote the great George Michael (who could also be called a Jizzman) "Sex is natural, sex is good. Not everybody does it, but everybody should..."

Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Ashkicksass, LOL! I'm delighted that this horn was able to.....er, never mind, I'll just say, thank you! ;-)

Adagio - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

Johnny...thank you, dear sir. (that's even more than I said before..lol)

Frankie - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment

This is really good! Lmao. Good job, and keep writing! 5.5.5.

Johnny D - July 24, 2004 - Report this comment

Thanks, Frankie!

Cookie-man - July 24, 2004 - Report this comment

Great work Johnny! And to some guy all I can say is "Frankie says relax" (If you are really slow like I am that is a reference To Frankie goes to Hollywood's "Relax") HE HE Also to some guy are you sure your name doesn't cum from that old Chinese dish "Cream of sum yung guy"? LMAO!!!!

Johnny D - July 24, 2004 - Report this comment

"Cream of sum yung guy"? LOL!! Mister Cookie-man, YOU WACKY!! Thanks very much! ;-D

Meriadoc - July 25, 2004 - Report this comment

Hey Johnny - how about doing "I Got Jism" by the Happenings? ;-D

Johnny D - July 25, 2004 - Report this comment

Merry, if you become the new webmaster of Whatfreaks, then I'll think about it! ;-)

BobyBird - November 08, 2004 - Report this comment

Johnny, This is the ABSOLUTE FUNNIEST ASS PARODY I HAVE EVER SEEN in the 4 years of browsing on Amiright. Well done, for you have gained the thumbs-up from the Bobster, and that is a hard acheivement. Well Done. Boby. PS: Anyone who thinks this parody sucks is the ABSOLUTE BIGGEST ANUS THIEF OF ALL TIME!

Johnny D - November 08, 2004 - Report this comment

Wow, thanks, BobyBird!

BobyBird - November 13, 2004 - Report this comment

No sweat Johnny! Any parody that uses the word "Testiclyin..." has gotta kick ass. Boby.

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Song Parodies -> J*zzman

"Jazzman"

Carole King

"J*zzman"

Johnny D

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