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Song Parodies -> "You're Cocaine"

Original Song Title:

"You're So Vain"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Carly Simon

Parody Song Title:

"You're Cocaine"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

I walked into the party
High dudes were chopping snow cubes and blocks

I had strategically nipped some bold fung-i
I barfed and then laughed a lot

I had one line on the mirror as
I watched some elf smoke pot

And then some girl screamed that
She'd be my partner
She'd be my partner
And...

You're cocaine
She prob'ly thinks my dong whizzes out you
You're cocaine
I'll bet she thinks my dong whizzes out you
Out you
Out you

(Well) I met you several years ago
When I was still drug-naive

In my head then you made such a pretty flare
I said you should never leave

But you flayed away the things I loved
And one of them was me

I had some dreams
They were
Lines on my mirror
Lines on my mirror
And...

You're cocaine
I snort so much my dong whizzes out you
You're cocaine
I'll betcha that my dong whizzes out you
Out you
Out you

(instrumental)

I had some dreams
They were
Spoons full of powder
Spoons full of powder
And...

You're cocaine
I snort so much my dong whizzes out you
You're cocaine
I'll betcha that my dong whizzes out you
Out you
Out you

Sent my dealer trippin' to Acapulco
For Snow/Horse/Ecstasy fun

Then I flew my Lear Jet down to Puerto Rico
To see ol' J-Lo's elliptical buns

Well I'm high on good speed all the time
I take so much
I think
I'm some kind of spy
Or the
Wife of a clothespin
Wife of a clothespin
And...

More cocaine!
I can't stand when my dong is without you!
MORE COCAINE!! (COCAINE!!)
Can't stand it when my dong is without you!
'Out you!
'Out you!
'OUT YOU, YEAH!!

(chop, sniff, snort, repeat)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 2
 0
 
 4   1
 2
 4
 
 5   11
 8
 8
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, JD, for giving me an idea. 15 grams.
Phil Alexander - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
You know, JD, I think you're getting better with age ;-) This is excellent.
Michael Pacholek - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody about coke is it!
alvin rhodes - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
a very intoxicating parody...5s
Ashkicksass - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm not going to say what I want to say. I'll just say good job, and 5's...
Adagio - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Pretty high job here! 5's
Johnny D - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
JB, Philbo, Michael, Alvin, Ashkicksass, Pat, thank you all very much!
Paul Robinson - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Nice job, JD. You know, I just jotted some parody ideas for the OS the other day but I haven't looked back at them yet. Great minds on the same track again. It was a totally different topic, however. Have to see what is was all about now.
Johnny D - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Paul. I hope you're feeling better, dude!
MrMacphisto - September 25, 2004 - Report this comment
This one gets "high" scores from me... 5,5,5
Johnny D - September 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, MrMacphisto.

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