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Song Parodies -> "Climb Up The Mast"

Original Song Title:

"Ride Captain Ride"

Original Performer:

Blues Image

Parody Song Title:

"Climb Up The Mast"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

Pirates at sea then sailed up
From their island hideaway
Rolled off of their ship
And here's what they had to say

"Captain Erbayshun wants a cabin-boy,
To fetch rum and brew,
And to swab our grimy decks,
And the crow's nest too!"

(But) no boy heard them callin'
No boy came outdoors
'Cause they were too 'fraid of swabbin' Old Erbayshun's floors

So they kidnapped me then
Back out we went to sea
Captain Erbayshun filled my life with misery

"Climb up the mast,"
Erbayshun said to me
"Me crow's nest, needs a sweep, so swab it me hearty!"

"Climb up the mast,"
Erbayshun said to me
"And then swab, me poop deck, with water from the sea!"


Seventy-three drunk sailors
From the Ca-rib-be-an Sea
Climbed onto our ship
And we had a big par-ty

They're swillin' every rum their eyes set on
Then they found some more
And they quaffed their minds away
Erbayshun then roared

"Climb up the mast,"
Erbayshun said to me
"Me amazed, how me men, are havin' fun at sea!"

"Climb up the mast,"
Erbayshun said to me
"Polish me, spyglass son, an' hold it up for me!"

"Climb up the mast,"
Erbayshun said to me
"Shinnying, up me mast, Erbayshun loves to see!"

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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Cookie-man - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Yet another Johhny D great! Excellent work! I bet Captain Erbayshun appreciates all that was done to the poop deck! ;)
drewster the rooster - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
not voting on this one coz i dont know the song, sure its great though, cookie-man seems to think so. anyway, i just realised that with my we will tax you parody u asked me how winter was down here (australia that is). well its been bloody cold the last too mornings, between 0 and 2 both mornings. now u ppl will say 'thats not cold, u dont know cold,' and in response i say, u choose to live in northern america, u know wot ur getting into, anyway, u seem like a nice guy so i thought id answer ur question
John Barry - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Shiver my timber, matey, that's funny!
Rick D - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Seeing those pictures of you makes me think you'd make a great Captain Bligh. Except all your bawdy jokes and innuendo might offend all those sailors!
alvin rhodes - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
yo ho ho...and a trio of 5s
Ashkicksass - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
I just saw this one - I didn't read it before because I DKTOS. But oh my hell. And I called you a scamp for Sex...
Dee - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Hilarious, Johnny D. All 5's. Easy to picture. How about Captain Hook as the ship proctologist?
Adagio - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
No words, just =:o :D
Johnny D - July 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks very much, everybody!

Cookie-man: He probably gave it the brown-glove test!

drewster the rooster: Thanks for remembering my request for a weather report from down under! 0 to 2 Celsius for you would be like 32 to 34 Farenheit for us here in New England. I guess it's all what you're used to. I'm a native New Englander, but the older I get, the less I like the winter's cold!


Rick D: Captain Bligh, eh? Not Captain Rum from "Black Adder" ? Wow, if my stuff would offend a sailor, I've really gone one-joke-over-the-line!

alvin: I'll drink to that, ARRRH!!

Ashkicksass: You can call me a scamp anytime you want, heh heh heh!

Dee: Captain Hook as the ship's proctologist? That thought reminds me of this exchange: "Arrrrh, cabin boy, Billy! Have ye ever been boned up the ass fer bein' a wise-guy?" "Why, no, Captain Hindgrinder!"

Pat: ;-D
Michael Pacholek - August 25, 2006 - Report this comment
I don't know how I missed this one the first time around, but I'm just glad you didn't do anything with the line, "They were too busy watching those old raindrops fall!" Five sheets to the wind.
Johnny D - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
ARRRRRHH, ME HEARTIES! Wednesday, September 19, 2007, be International Talk Like A Pirate Day! ARRRRRHH !!
Johnny D - September 16, 2008 - Report this comment
ARRRRRHH, ME HEARTIES! Friday, September 19, 2008, be International Talk Like A Pirate Day! ARRRRRHH !!

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