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Song Parodies -> "Drunken Old Man"

Original Song Title:

"Angry Young Man"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Drunken Old Man"

Parody Written by:

Jack Hansen

The Lyrics

There's a place at the bar for the drunken old man
With his red blood-shot eyes and his trembling hands

His breath really smells and his penis is small
And he's always at home where there is alcohol

And he's proud of his scars from the times he's been tossed
And he gurgles and burps as he guzzles his sauce
In this town he is known as the drunken old man

Give a moment or two to the drunken old man
Cigarette in his mouth and a beer in his hand

He's been stumbling around, he's passed out where he stood
He's forgetting things lately, his memory's not good

And he sits in his room and he drinks a few more
While a puddle of vomit dries up on the floor
In this town he is known as the drunken old man

There was one time he took the pledge when he fell into a thorny hedge
But now you'll see him in a bar every night
He'll have a whiskey shot or two
And wash it down with a pint of brew
Then he'll keep on drinking vodka 'till it blurs his sight

I know of a place with a drunken old man
Who sits in a chair 'cause he can hardly stand
And you know he is done when his head hits the bar
Someone please take his keys if he heads for his car
And his liver is dying and his brain cells as well
And he's bald and he's crude and his feet really smell
And he'll go to the grave as a drunken old man

Yes there's always a place for the drunken old man
With his dick a small size and his brown spotted hands
He bruises his head and he bruises his balls
And he bruises his tale bone whenever he falls
He's so drunk when he pisses he misses the bowl
And they'll impound his car if he hits a lamp pole
And he'll always be known as the drunken old man

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   4

User Comments

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Leo - November 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Damn. Very well done. I've thought about doing this tune for a while, but haven't been able to pull it off. Love the pisses/misses internal rhyme too. Pacing seems a tad off on the bridge, but fantastic overall. - November 14, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent work. Autobiographical?
Michael Pacholek - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Pacing is off on the bridge? The old man must be driving. Not you, Billy. (See "All You Want to Do Is Drive")

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