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Song Parodies -> "Scramblin' Man"

Original Song Title:

"Ramblin' Man"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Allman brothers

Parody Song Title:

"Scramblin' Man"

Parody Written by:

Dennis

The Lyrics

this one is asking for it. Writing about alien chickens (black roosters) that make gamecocks look silly for attitude and pugnacity, and are five feet tall and ninety pounds of addrenalin-driven fury... The name of the rewrite speaks for itself! (Just try using YOUR roer stuffed full of loopers on a black rooster, and see how long you live! (Note: a roer is a four-bore smoothbore 'elephant gun', and 'loopers' are what many Boers used when they were being swarmed by Zulus and other irritated natives bent on slaughtering the Voortrekkers. Some died by Assagai.) (Zulu stabbing Spear. Made famous by T'Chaka.)
Scramblin' Man.

Load! I was born a scramblin' man,
Trying to stay alive, an doin' what I can,
When it's time for me to run, I hope you un'erstand...
That I was born a scramblin' man.

My father raised alien chickens down in Waycross Georgia,
Till a big black rooster one day ignored his gun,
I was run out of the house ahead of that irritated bird,
And now the whole state is on the run!

Load! I was born a scramblin' man,
Trying to stay alive, an doin' what I can,
When it's time for me to run, I hope you un'erstand...
That I was born a scramblin' man.

"Buh-Gawk!" (Sound of an irritated rooster inclined toward eating
the narator. Them things weigh ninety pounds and are harder to stop than
three elephants and two cape buffalo. Sure, they lay *huge* eggs. How you
gonna collect them things, boy? Wearing an Iron-Man suit? They'll tear
that thing up like a sardine tin and eat you for lunch!)

Runnin' this way west to Louisiana,
Hope them dikes hold up this time,
The birds have all escaped, flying like planes, never leave the sky,
I think I'm gonna drop my head down lay down and die!

Load! I was born a scramblin' man,
Trying to stay alive, doin' what I can,
When it's time for me to run, I hope you un'erstand...
That I was born a scramblin' man.

Lord, I was born a scramblin' man
Lord, I was born a scramblin' man
Lord, I was born a scramblin' man
Lord, I was born a scramblin' man
Black roosters (You'll see a picture sometime in the future on slowginonline.com) are rather stout birds. First, they commonly lay rotten eggs fit for an ostrich, and they dump lots of them - sometimes while flying, which they do quite well. An intercept of a patch of the 101st airborne is thought to be a black rooster 'in Moult' - which is when they are most irritable. Note that finally, it's not uncommon for a black rooster to be need to be turned into 'a mine for lead' before it even thinks about quitting, and it is altogether possible for one of those birds to survive a direct hit by an RPG and come after the person shooting the thing!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Patrick - October 20, 2010 - Report this comment
This scenario would make a great horror movie.
Mark Scotti - October 20, 2010 - Report this comment
Great twist on the OS! I did one of my own: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/allmanbrothersband4.shtml
Old Man Ribber - October 20, 2010 - Report this comment
dennis - Good job, and please don't be so dark! My job ("social"...lol) is to bring joy and happiness to all I encounter. I agree with a lot of what you say and appreciate that you say I *get* it. But...I am less a warrior than a medic of the spirit. Keep writing....you are truly a good dude. :)
Ann Hammond - October 22, 2010 - Report this comment
he he

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